Friendly Fridays: A radical proposal

[horsefly 4,732]

How about we all agree that on Fridays no one responds to another's post by slagging them off or being rude? 

I, like many it seems, find myself easily tempted into responding to those who have annoyed me with an attempted cutting riposte that descends quickly into abusive comment. Football forums, it seems, are a veritable repository of crude insults. However, the evidence is that this just stultifies debate, cements attitudes, and creates an unpleasant atmosphere.

So who's up for an experiment whereby we self-police Fridays to ensure they remain insult free? You never know, but it might just lead to an improvement in the quality of discussion on other days too.

Here's my suggestion for an initial protocol:

1. All responses involving a disagreement would begin with the code IRD (I respectfully disagree) followed by responses that entirely focus on the point(s) of disagreement.

2. All ad hominem comments forbidden (i.e. no reference to a posters past posts, or character)

No doubt there is someting utopian in what I'm suggesting. But to be clear, I'm not suggesting that we don't engage in robust disagreement, merely that we don't allow that to descend into rudeness and insults.

The amount of abuse (some of it very extreme) that is filling football forums universally surely suggests that it would do no harm to attempt something like I'm suggesting. A more pleasant environment in which to discuss the game and team we ALL love, might just encourage more people to participate in that discussion.

 

 

 

[Hank shoots Skyler 2,094]

Binner.

[Branston Pickle 3,841]

Sod off!…..oops, forgot it’s Friday🙄🙂….not a bad general idea, but it ought to not be beyond people to be civil all the time, not just Fridays….

[Greavsy 2,540]

Or why not just all try to be civil and respectful every day.......

[BigFish 2,089]

1 minute ago, Hank shoots Skyler said:

Binner.

Nice work, beat me to it.

[TheGunnShow 6,588]

HELVITIS SPASSARI!! 😉 

[Greavsy 2,540]

Just now, Branston Pickle said:

Sod off!…..oops, forgot it’s Friday🙄🙂….not a bad general idea, but it ought to not be beyond people to be civil all the time, not just Fridays….

You just beat me to it Branston. 

But well said, old chap, and I totally agree. But I reserve the right to disagree on non Fridays! 

[Crabbycanary3 994]

10 minutes ago, Greavsy said:

Or why not just all try to be civil and respectful every day.......

Radical

[Capt. Pants 4,502]

Not going to happen. 

This forum is becoming a bit pathetic really in the way that certain posters seem to chase each other around.

So many threads get derailed by petty childish spats hiding the well balanced thought out posts.

 

[Rock The Boat 1,332]

28 minutes ago, horsefly said:

How about we all agree that on Fridays no one responds to another's post by slagging them off or being rude? 

I, like many it seems, find myself easily tempted into responding to those who have annoyed me with an attempted cutting riposte that descends quickly into abusive comment. Football forums, it seems, are a veritable repository of crude insults. However, the evidence is that this just stultifies debate, cements attitudes, and creates an unpleasant atmosphere.

So who's up for an experiment whereby we self-police Fridays to ensure they remain insult free? You never know, but it might just lead to an improvement in the quality of discussion on other days too.

Here's my suggestion for an initial protocol:

1. All responses involving a disagreement would begin with the code IRD (I respectfully disagree) followed by responses that entirely focus on the point(s) of disagreement.

2. All ad hominem comments forbidden (i.e. no reference to a posters past posts, or character)

No doubt there is someting utopian in what I'm suggesting. But to be clear, I'm not suggesting that we don't engage in robust disagreement, merely that we don't allow that to descend into rudeness and insults.

The amount of abuse (some of it very extreme) that is filling football forums universally surely suggests that it would do no harm to attempt something like I'm suggesting. A more pleasant environment in which to discuss the game and team we ALL love, might just encourage more people to participate in that discussion.

 

 

 

Oh the irony meter has just broken

[horsefly 4,732]

1 minute ago, Rock The Boat said:

Oh the irony meter has just broken

Well of course that sort of response is to be expected. But just for clarification my suggestion is about the football threads not the non-football threads. It's a shame you couldn't respond with something constructive to say.

[horsefly 4,732]

OK have it your way guys! I tried to suggest just one day of posting respectfully and you've made your feelings clear that that's asking a bit too much. Back to normality and I apolgise for being so bold and reckless in suggesting such a thing

[king canary 8,085]

7 minutes ago, horsefly said:

Well of course that sort of response is to be expected. But just for clarification my suggestion is about the football threads not the non-football threads. It's a shame you couldn't respond with something constructive to say.

Why would people not be expected to be civil on non-football threads?

Weird that if you're discussing Todd Cantwell's potential move to Villa your rules would be all about civility but if you and the same poster are discussing Brexit you'd be OK to call each others ****.

[Greavsy 2,540]

1 minute ago, king canary said:

Why would people not be expected to be civil on non-football threads?

Weird that if you're discussing Todd Cantwell's potential move to Villa your rules would be all about civility but if you and the same poster are discussing Brexit you'd be OK to call each others ****.

I had similar thoughts, and was about to post likewise. 

I guess it confirms people use different personalities on here. A bit of playing the poster too perhaps? 

[Wings of a Sparrow 1,570]

How about we also don't respond to obvious trolling posts and push them down out of sight.

[Rock The Boat 1,332]

13 minutes ago, horsefly said:

Well of course that sort of response is to be expected. But just for clarification my suggestion is about the football threads not the non-football threads. It's a shame you couldn't respond with something constructive to say.

You and Bill have made non-football threads toxic to the point where very few posters go there  these days. Now you two are moving into the football arena. So far you have had the good sense to curb your temper in the football section although your mate is less self-aware. 

I wonder what brought this on, did you receive a warning from the Deleter and feel a sense of guilt?

[horsefly 4,732]

Just now, king canary said:

Why would people not be expected to be civil on non-football threads?

Weird that if you're discussing Todd Cantwell's potential move to Villa your rules would be all about civility but if you and the same poster are discussing Brexit you'd be OK to call each others ****.

I would prefer it if we could all be civil all the time, but I was merely trying to suggest something that might be  realistically achievable. Clearly there is not the will for that on this site. As for why football and not politics: Football is a game we ALL claim to love and Norwich a team we ALL claim to love too, so you would think there might be some prospect of being able to discuss those issues civilly given the unity of us ALL wanting our team to do well. I am not so stupid as to think there is anything that potentially unites divergent political viewpoints. It was merely a sugestion in the hope it might help encourage more visitors to feel they could contribute to a football discussion without fear of being ridiculed. I clearly misjudged the "mood of the site in this respect so it seems us old men would rather just slug it out as usual.

[Greavsy 2,540]

3 minutes ago, Rock The Boat said:

You and Bill have made non-football threads toxic to the point where very few posters go there  these days. Now you two are moving into the football arena. So far you have had the good sense to curb your temper in the football section although your mate is less self-aware. 

I wonder what brought this on, did you receive a warning from the Deleter and feel a sense of guilt?

Aren't Bill & Horsefly the same person? 

Sure that was proven elsewhere recently. 

[horsefly 4,732]

27 minutes ago, Rock The Boat said:

You and Bill have made non-football threads toxic to the point where very few posters go there  these days. Now you two are moving into the football arena. So far you have had the good sense to curb your temper in the football section although your mate is less self-aware. 

I wonder what brought this on, did you receive a warning from the Deleter and feel a sense of guilt?

Best you consider your own contributions on the political threads in regards to their toxicity which has seen them removed on an epic scale (do you really want me to repeat some of your most egregious "contributions"?). I'm well aware that the fact that I have called you out for some of the disgusting things you have posted, and called for you to apologise, infuriates you. I have not "moved in but always posted on the football threads from the moment I joined.

I have never received any kind of warning from the "Deleter", ever. I merely find it depressing that we are on a football thread to discuss football (not life or death issues) and day after day the same points get slung around but with increasing levels of hostility. I mistakenly thought it would be worthwhile trying to set a different tone in an attempt to encourage some others who don't post into contributing to the debate. Clearly I got that very wrong and many posters on here that I genuinely respect have responded in ways I genuinely didn't expect. So my mistake.

Edited August 6, 2021 by horsefly

[Rock The Boat 1,332]

8 minutes ago, Greavsy said:

Aren't Bill & Horsefly the same person? 

Sure that was proven elsewhere recently. 

Horsefly appeared from nowhere at the same time as Bill disappeared and they have similar writing styles and anger management issues so the speculation was they are one and the same. 

[Nuff Said 5,496]

 

[hogesar 10,051]

Can you imagine Bill, Til, Greavsy and FF all starting their posts to each other with "I respectfully disagree".

I'm in just to see if we can make that happen 😂 

[Duncan Edwards 2,308]

2 minutes ago, hogesar said:

Can you imagine Bill, Til, Greavsy and FF all starting their posts to each other with "I respectfully disagree".

I'm in just to see if we can make that happen 😂 

No.

[hogesar 10,051]

4 minutes ago, Duncan Edwards said:

No.

Because a couple might struggle to spell 'respectfully' ?

Dammit, broken the friendly friday already.

 

[horsefly 4,732]

9 minutes ago, hogesar said:

Can you imagine Bill, Til, Greavsy and FF all starting their posts to each other with "I respectfully disagree".

I'm in just to see if we can make that happen 😂 

Well I did say it was probably a utopian suggestion. My hope was that those who feel compelled to be insulting might at least take a day off. I suppose I should have known better and just accept that this is now the norm for social media. Bit of a shame really, as I'm sure there are a few youngsters out there who would love to contribute but are put off by "confident" old men at their belligerent best.

Edited August 6, 2021 by horsefly

[Fuzzar 1,711]

Don't give up so easily Horsefly, you hopeless quitter.

[horsefly 4,732]

2 minutes ago, Fuzzar said:

Don't give up so easily Horsefly, you hopeless quitter.

Thanks for the encoragement you old ****

[Greavsy 2,540]

11 minutes ago, hogesar said:

Can you imagine Bill, Til, Greavsy and FF all starting their posts to each other with "I respectfully disagree".

I'm in just to see if we can make that happen 😂 

I respectfully disagree Hoggy! 

Seriously, this place is pretty grim at times, and I admit to some part of that accusation.  

[Greavsy 2,540]

11 minutes ago, horsefly said:

Well I did say it was probably a utopian suggestion. My hope was that those who feel compelled to be insulting might at least take a day off. I suppose I should have known better and just accept that this is now the norm for social media.

Funny you say that horsefly, I had a self imposed 24 hour excile from posting on this forum this week. 

I still read the threads, and wanted to reply to a few, but resisted.

Funnily enough, despite other peoples views on my posts,  there was still plenty of bickering without my input.

I felt better for it too. That said I do enjoy this place generally,  so I'm sorry to say I'm not leaving anytime soon. 

Too many people play the poster on here. 

Edited August 6, 2021 by Greavsy

[Nuff Said 5,496]

34 minutes ago, Rock The Boat said:

Horsefly appeared from nowhere at the same time as Bill disappeared and they have similar writing styles and anger management issues so the speculation was they are one and the same. 

An alternative point of view would be that Horsefly is intelligent and articulate, and has put you in your place on several of the the non-Football threads that you’ve posted on. Pretending he’s an alter-ego of the board’s current pantomime villain means you can conveniently dismiss those painful defeats.