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Mr Apples

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Mr Apples last won the day on October 14 2019

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  1. Mr Apples

    Let's all do the pools week 3

    Number 47 for me - St Johnstone vs. Hamilton Accies. Apples
  2. Mr Apples

    Small Claim To Fame.

    "Also Hitler related-the house I live in now was the childhood home of a man who married Martin Bormann’s secretary." I used to live up the road from the place where Rudolf Hess was captured after parachuting from his plane just south of Glasgow. Apples
  3. Mr Apples

    Let's all do the pools week 2

    Number 32 for me (Edinburgh City vs Cove Rangers). Apples
  4. Mr Apples

    Football Pools help needed..

    Nutty, can i now be referred to as Apples, Mr (that should get me up the league). Apples
  5. It may not work so well on the small screen (as it's small on the big screen) but I saw The Lighthouse a few weeks back and it was incredible. Apples
  6. It didn't sell very well...so he's been having to give it away, give it away, give it away now. Apples
  7. Mr Apples

    Remedy To Stop Panic Buying.

    What was the avocado, Puy lentil and Kalamata olive status? Apples
  8. Mr Apples

    Football Pools help needed..

    Hi Nutty, can you change mine to No. 29 - Accies vs. Hibs. Apples
  9. He's waiting for a bulk scampi delivery from Deliveroo. Apples
  10. Mr Apples

    Football Pools help needed..

    Hi Pink'un Pools Pickers (PuPPs) , I'll go for number 32 - Kilmarnock vs. Motherwell. Nutty, that fiver from last week is still on its way to you so please add it to one of the charity pots. Apples
  11. Mr Apples

    Sutton's thoughts...

    Sutton is also keen for the season to be called in it's current position so Celtic become Scottish champions and achieve nine in a row...funnily enough the other side want the season to be declared null and void. Apples
  12. Mr Apples

    What’s your favourite animal?

    Sloths...saw them hanging around the place in Costa Rica a couple of years ago. Very, very strange creatures. Apples
  13. Mr Apples

    The official Loo Roll thread

    Who is bog roll king of this message board, (from the Daily Mash)? I am the bog roll king by Nathan Muir of Hitchin, Hertfordshire I AM king of the bog roll. I sit on a throne built from 24-packs of only the softest, most absorbant loo paper. None may challenge my reign. You panic-bought this weekend? Oh, my child. I have been buying up stocks for weeks. I have more toilet roll than anyone in a 15-mile radius, including small shops. It will never run out. You’ve filled your garage with it? Ah, your naivety makes me chuckle. You remind me of myself, six weeks ago. I have filled my whole house. I no longer have a bed. I sleep on bog roll. I eat at a bog roll table. I lounge on a supremely comfortable bog roll sofa. Every room in my house is piled to the ceiling with sweet, wonderful bog roll. Soon, society will collapse. Banknotes won’t be worth, if you’ll pardon my joke, wiping your bum on. There will be only one source of wealth, only one currency. And I have cornered the market. They will come to me, the former great and good, laid low by their own foulage. They will give me diamonds, titles, positions of great power in return for a single roll of Andrex Skin Kind with aloe vera and chamomile. I will take all as my due. I am the bog roll king. I am the emperor of the sh*thouse. All hail me.
  14. Mr Apples

    Premier League meeting 10.00am today

    They'll probably only manage a cubic zirconia tiara (from Elizabeth Duke at Argos). Apples
  15. Mr Apples

    Premier League meeting 10.00am today

    That'll probably deserve another star. Apples
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