Park Bench

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Lamberts says we need to improve the dugouts as he cant see Sir Alex sitting on a park bench!

I say dont lets make coming to Carrow Road uncomfortable as possible.....park bench, turn the hot taps off make them change in a broom cupboard! Anything to put teams off.

[Rasputin was a C... 0]

Has the away dressing room been painted dark grey as was the case with Colchester. Seem to remember the BBC did a feature on it around the time we played them last season and went on about how Lambert had insisted that the away facilities were as unpleasant as allowed.

[San Miguel 0]

absolutely make it as grim as possible for away teams - perhaps paint the bench in the away dug out bright pink!

[alysha 0]

Or paint it every match day, let the away team sit on wet paint

[Power Hamster 0]

[quote user="Rasputin was a C..."]Has the away dressing room been painted dark grey as was the case with Colchester. Seem to remember the BBC did a feature on it around the time we played them last season and went on about how Lambert had insisted that the away facilities were as unpleasant as allowed.[/quote]Didn''t work for Colchester, did it? We beat them 5-0 at their place.I think we need to do the exact opposite - make the away facilities as luxurious as possible, with unlimited food and drink, and high-class call girls to attend to the players every need. With any luck, by kick-off time they will be too exhausted to play football.

[San Miguel 0]

not sure that''s strictly within the league rules..

but hey, with some Premier League money we can just pay a fine for any illegal actions we make - as in the case QPR vs Logic.

[nutty nigel 7,644]

[quote user="Rasputin was a C..."]Has the away dressing room been painted dark grey as was the case with Colchester. Seem to remember the BBC did a feature on it around the time we played them last season and went on about how Lambert had insisted that the away facilities were as unpleasant as allowed.
[/quote]

The away dressing room is painted in really depressing colours. Has and old wooden treatment table stuck in the middle. It is as souless dull and depressing as you could imagine. The entrance in also a long way down a narrow depressing and unwelcoming corridor. Or it was when I saw it 18 months ago.

 

The home dressing is the complete opposite. Bright and quite hi-tech.

 

Chalk and cheese is the only way to describe the difference.

 

[Paul 0]

I had a tour a couple of years ago after one of th kit launches and was looking forward to seeing the dressing rooms.

Both the home and away ones were tiny, was like being back at school, the away one is smallest and is miserable. All it had on the wall was a small A3 size white board and nothing else.

[Alex Moss 2,165]

[quote user="Power Hamster"][quote user="Rasputin was a C..."]Has the away dressing room been painted dark grey as was the case with Colchester. Seem to remember the BBC did a feature on it around the time we played them last season and went on about how Lambert had insisted that the away facilities were as unpleasant as allowed.[/quote]Didn''t work for Colchester, did it? We beat them 5-0 at their place.I think we need to do the exact opposite - make the away facilities as luxurious as possible, with unlimited food and drink, and high-class call girls to attend to the players every need. With any luck, by kick-off time they will be too exhausted to play football. [/quote]

Sorry PowerHamster, but players like Mr Rooney and Terry thrive in such an environment - It definitely needs to be a Call Girl/Pensioner free zone.

[Lets be aving you! 0]

John Beck at Cambridge United (when a useful if somewhat unattractive long-ball team) had a bit of a reputation on this, taking things to extremes.

He reportedly instructed that the away changing room be as small as possible, be painted black throughout and that all electric sockets be removed.

Not sure whether anyone on here can confirm whether this actually happened, but a Cambrige United-supporting friend swears that this was the case and is not an urban myth.

[Norfolk Mustard 94]

Within the rules do we actually need to provide the opposition with anything at all to sit on?

Sir Alex must have a shooting stick or something! Be just like watching his horses...

[Beauseant 0]

[quote user="CambsCanary"]John Beck at Cambridge United (when a useful if somewhat unattractive long-ball team) had a bit of a reputation on this, taking things to extremes. He reportedly instructed that the away changing room be as small as possible, be painted black throughout and that all electric sockets be removed. Not sure whether anyone on here can confirm whether this actually happened, but a Cambrige United-supporting friend swears that this was the case and is not an urban myth.[/quote]

 

Absolutely true. He would also have buckets of water thrown over the floor as the away team coach was drawing up and ensure that the room was freezing.

He also instructed the groundsman to leave longer grass in the corners of the pitch so that his teams habitual hoofs would hold up!

[Harry 0]

As my Grandmother would have said "He can stick his thumbs up his @rse and sit on his elbows"

[Mr. Bump 0]

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/teams/manchester-united/5253146/Premier-League-dressing-rooms-draw-Sir-Alex-Fergusons-fire.htmlWonder if he''ll be complaining about ours next season.

[Canary23 0]

Heaven forbid he should have to sit in an uncomfortable plastic seat with limited legroom!

[Norfolk Mustard 94]

Will we be getting some flashy super padded seats for the managers, coaches and subs like the Audi-sponsored ones at Old Trafford? Perhaps our yellow seats could be sponsored by Aviva - or Lotus if a second main sponsor is allowed?

It may mean losing some spectator seats in the rows behind the existing ''park benches'' though!