I know it's a bit of a cliché

[Cantley 0]

But this could have been written for Worthy:

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you
But make allowance for their doubting too,
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don''t deal in lies,
Or being hated, don''t give way to hating,
And yet don''t look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream--and not make dreams your master,
If you can think--and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you''ve spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build ''em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it all on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!"

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings--nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much,
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds'' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that''s in it,
And--which is more--you''ll be a Man, my son!

[Saint Canary 0]

Well, if we are qouting Kipling;

"MASTER, this is Thy Servant. He is rising eight weeks old.
He is mainly Head and Tummy. His legs are uncontrolled.
But Thou has forgiven his ugliness, and settled him on Thy knee ...
Art Thou content with Thy Servant? He is very comfy with Thee.

Master, behold a Sinner! He hath committed a wrong.
He hath defiled Thy Premises through being kept in too long.
Wherefore his nose has been rubbed in the dirt, and his self-respect has been bruised,
Master, pardon Thy Sinner, and see he is properly loosed.

 

Master - again Thy Sinner! This that was once Thy Shoe,
He has found and taken and carried aside, as fitting matter to chew.
Now there is neither blacking nor tongue, and the Housemaid has us in tow.
Master, remember Thy Servant is young, and tell her to let him go!

 

Master, extol Thy Servant, he has met a most Worthy Foe!
There has been fighting all over the Shop - and into the Shop also!
Till cruel umbrellas parted the strife (or I might have been choking him yet)
But Thy Servant has had the Time of his Life - and now shall we call on the vet?

 

Master, behold Thy Servant! Strange children came to play,
And because they fought to caress him, Thy Servant wentedst away.
But now that the Little Beasts have gone, he has returned to see
(Brushed - with his Sunday collar on) what they left over from tea.

 

Master, pity Thy Servant! He is deaf and three parts blind.
He cannot catch Thy Commandments. He cannot read Thy Mind.
Oh, leave him not to his loneliness; nor make him that kitten''s scorn.
He hath had none other God than Thee since the year that he was born.

 

[Mark .Y. 337]

And, if we are still quoting Kipling

"I make extremely good cakes.............."

Mark .Y.

[Fat Barman 0]

I was always told:

If you can keep your head,
When all about you are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
You probably don''t know what''s going on!

(and I support the bloke!)

[Dicky 0]

[quote]But this could have been written for Worthy: If you can keep your head when all about you Are losing theirs and blaming it on you, If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you But make allowance ...[/quote]

Blimey a bit of culture on these boards.  Nice post 6 Bloody nil.

 

 

[Cantley 0]

[quote]Well, if we are qouting Kipling; " MASTER, this is Thy Servant. He is rising eight weeks old. He is mainly Head and Tummy. His legs are uncontrolled. But Thou has forgiven his ugliness, and settled h...[/quote]

Mainly head and tummy? Ugly? This has to be about Joe Royle, right?

[Saint Canary 0]

[quote]Mainly head and tummy? Ugly? This has to be about Joe Royle, right?[/quote]

Could well be.  This is without a doubt one of the most obscure threads I have ever seen.

[shropshire canary 0]

Some other appropriate literature also comes to mind:

Paradise Lost (or "why we only had one season in the Premiership)

The Ancient Mariner (who shot that albatross at Colney?)

Bleak House (an alternative name for Carrow Road)

Julius Caesar ( when Worthy leaves will he be heard to cry "et tu Delia?")

To Kill a Mockingbird (what has happened to Captain Canary this season?)

Pride and Prejudice (aka loyaty to our manager)

Great Expectations (what we all had in early August this year)

 

 

[gazzathegreat 0]

What about

Wuthering Heights   Life in the Upper River End

A Tale of Two Cities - er us and er no, not the Scum, sorry they''re just a town

Oliver Twist - Can we have some more midfielders, Mr Munby sir?

Romeo and Juliet - er, better not go there

A Midsummer''s Night Dream - a good pre-season goal fest at Dereham

The Three Musketeers - Deano, Hucks and McVeigh

Sense and Sensibility - Us lot on the forum

Alice in Wonderland - Nigel at Colney

MacBeth - What is Foley up to?

Sorry must stop now for a flick through "The Sun"

[LinkNR9 0]

How about...

''The Old Man and the CCC'' - Worthy''s quest in the Coca Cola Championship.

''Dearth of a Snailsman'' - In which Arthur Miller voices his opinion that Deano''s lack of pace is contributing to his current goal drought.

''The Ancient Mariner'' - Derby Day Memories, Volume 2.

''The Lord of the Wings'' - Tolkein''s account of how he transformed a perfectly good striker into a second rate wide midfielder.

''CatchYa in the Eye'' - JD Salinger''s version of the training ground incident involving Leon and Damien Francis. 

''Mid-Table in March'' - The George Eliot classic.

''The Lotus Sponsors'' - Alfred (Lord) Tennyson. 

 ''The Gripes of Wrath (of the Barclay)'' - John Steinbeck joins the unofficial message board.

''Robinson Crusade'' - Daniel Defoe expresses his desire to help Worthy land the Sunderland midfielder on loan. 

''SlowLita'' - Nabakov''s novel was an inspiration to Worthy when preparing for the away game at Reading.

''The Comedy of Errors'' - Shakespeare''s rigorous examination of Worthy''s forays into the transfer market.