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Pi$$ed As A Mattress

Cranworth Reserves Swoop For Cureton

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Cranworth FC reserve team manager Neil Davis has expressed his frustration at his boards total lack of ambition. Whilst he was marking the lines at 8am on Saturday morning the chairman arrived with a new striker for him.

Davis said " I am gutted, the lads have been working their socks off all pre season, I promised them we would be bringing in a big name striker, and look what happens"

Davis went on to rant " I have been looking at various striking options, I spent Monday night at Yaxham, Tuesday evening at Wells-next-the-Sea looking for that elusive capture, then my chairman drops a bombshell by telling me all I can have is Cureton"

Players from the Sunday leauge team are said to be furious. One player, who refused to be named said "If he thinks I am going to work my socks off getting crosses into the box for him to spoon into the field of oil seed rape next door, he can get knotted"

One other player refused to be named purely because he didnt want his friends and family knowing he was due to be playing in the same team as Jamie, simply saying "I''m off to Toftwood"

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