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Iwans Big Toe

Have we started cloning our strikers in a vat at Colney?

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Discussing Nathan Redmond''s end product against Bournemouth in today''s article on the website Adams is quoted as thus:"The goal was what he is all about at his best, attacking full-backs and

whipping balls in and then it is up to the Grabbans and Laffertys and

Cameron Jeromes to get on the end of them,‚ÄĚThis would lead me to believe that we have more than one Lewis Grabban, Kyle Lafferty and Cameron Jerome in our current squad. This leads me to ask several questions.1. How many Grabbans, Laffery''s and Jeromes do we have at the club?2. Where have they all come from? Are we cloning them or have we discovered a dimensional rift and have started pulling them through from alternate realities?3. Do we have to pay each of the Grabbans, Laffertys and Jeromes a wage or do they all count as the same person and legally fall under the one conract?4. How do we go about registering clones and doppelgangers under FA rules? Do we have to register them individually or are they all considered to be the same person, thus we only have to fill out one registration form for all of our Grabbans, Lafertys and Jeromes? This I feel is a key factor to consider. What would happen if we gain automatic promotion and the FA discover we have fielded an ineligible player from an alternate reality. I would hate for us to be docked points and miss out on automatic promotion because of a situation like that.5. Would we be able to play clones in the same team, for instance have a front 3 just of our Lewis Grabbans? It would make any opposition plans for man marking nigh on impossible, but how would three of the same person gel into an effective strike force?I want answers!!!!!

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Calm down dear, it''s merely a turn of phrase.I suggest you go fetch your Panini album and here, have enough pennies to go get yourself a new pack of stickers and a curly-wurly.

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The only and most important question by far, is why if Adams is well aware of what Redmond is best at, does Redmond very very rarely attempt it?

He tried to beat his man and get a cross in on only two other occasions against Bournemouth. Winning a corner with one of them. He played more like Snoddy for the majority of the game, cutting back and passing to Whittaker. Slowing down play etc.

Surely its quite simple, Redmond has the pace to beat most FBs, so just tell him to do that. Occasionally mix it up and cut back inside, but his main aim should be to get crosses in the box.

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Agree to an extent Gingerpele, but as a defender, would you rather be facing someone who you know is going to try and beat you on the outside/whip in a cross, or someone who is unpredictable?

Surely if a defender is never entirely sure what a winger is going to do, then it''s far more difficult to defend against them?

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But they do know what he''s going to do. They know he''s going to cut back in.

He has started extending his passing range which is good. But going back to your point last season in the cup against Watford Reds must have managed to get well over a dozen crosses in from the byline after beating the FB. When you''ve got his pace it doesn''t really matter how predictable you are. Hucks only ever went two ways really, but it worked. Redmond can mix it up, but he needs to whip crosses in a lot more.

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[quote user="Gingerpele"]But they do know what he''s going to do. They know he''s going to cut back in.

He has started extending his passing range which is good. But going back to your point last season in the cup against Watford Reds must have managed to get well over a dozen crosses in from the byline after beating the FB. When you''ve got his pace it doesn''t really matter how predictable you are. Hucks only ever went two ways really, but it worked. Redmond can mix it up, but he needs to whip crosses in a lot more.[/quote]What - left or right? What were the other options? Up? Down? [8-)]

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Well this thread got off topic rather quickly. We are supposed to be discussing where these Grabbans, Lafertys and Jeromes have come from and how we could effectively intergrate more than one of these doppelgangers into the first team starting line up at the same time. Instead Gingerpele has highjacked the discussion with his own agenda, and is completely ignoring the original topic of this thread and has started discussing Nathan Redmond''s final ball.Can we please get back on topic?To help assist in this let me pose another question. Why have we got multiple Laffertys, Grabbans and Jeromes, yet there is no mention of having any more than one Gary Hooper? Is it because he is the best striker at the club and therefore we only require one of him? Or is it that now we have numerous versions of Cameron Jerome, Hooper is surpluss to requirements and he will be loaned out to Rotherham at the soonest available opportunity to form a potent strike force with Becchio? May be he is the only striker that refused to supply the club with a sample of his DNA as he likes the fans in the snakepit singing "There''s only one Gary Hooper"?

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I have no idea how we are cloning our players. But it makes sense as they would only need to be registered as one player!

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[quote user="star_manic"]I think if we are cloning them, it would more likely be in a Petri dish rather than a vat.[/quote]I suspect any cloning procedures that take place at Colney are likely to begin in a petri dish. However I think a 2 inch in circumferance dish is going to be inadequate when you are looking to replecate a life size version of Cameron Jerome, who stands at over six foot tall. Add to this that Neil Adams suggested that we have multiple versions of each striker (except for no apparent reason Gary Hooper as pointed I out in a previous post), it stands to reason that a vat, or indeed vats, would be the most obvious way to complete the cloning process. Have you never seen Star Wars Episode II???!!!

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[quote user="Ice Cold Pineapple Soda"]Due to the lack of appreciation for colloqialisms on this thread, the above statement should have read as "a mighty oak grows from a little acorn."[/quote]I believe it was Chaucer which first coined a similar phrase "as an ook cometh of a litel spyr" in modern English it would be along the lines of "an oak comes from a little sapling".However we are not supposed to be discussing the finer points of syntax and grammar in the English language on this thread. [:@]

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