Unsung heroes

[lappinitup 629]

Yep, I''m talking about those half-time heroes, the forkers! As soon as the players trudge off the field, there they are, forking about. How do they get there? I never seem to see them walking on to the pitch and yet suddenly, they''re there. Sometimes it''s so cold it must be forking hell but there they are, forking their divots. How do you become a forker? I''ve never even met one. Do they have to be forking trained? Do they get Paid? Do YOU know a forker?Fork on......

[lake district canary 0]

There''s the song about the forkers in the history of forking online atThe National Forking College.

 

It goes:

 

Fork on, Fork on, with hope in your heart, and you''ll never fork  alone, you''ll never fork alone.

 

Liverpool liked it so much when their forking forkers sung it before a match that they changed it and used it as their anthem.

 

Fork me! (as the divot said to the forker)

 

 

 

 

[Kathy 733]

I''m sure if you wrote a nice letter to Mr McNally Lapp, you could ''Meet the Forkers''.

[Mister Chops 7]

As I understand it there are a lot of little forkers who are all managed by the mother forker.

[The DicTaTor 0]

Never met a forker? I really do not believe you, I am sure that you have met plenty? Maybe you just haven''t realised?

[nutty nigel 7,509]

I remember when we''d have the British Legion Brass Band to entertain us at halftime. Good wholesome family tunes that we could stamp our feet to. Now all we get are these old forkers replacing divots no doubt kicked out by those would be forkers doing the cross bar challenge.

 

Boo the forkers off that''s what I say![:@]

[lake district canary 0]

[quote user="nutty nigel"]

I remember when we''d have the British Legion Brass Band to entertain us at halftime. Good wholesome family tunes that we could stamp our feet to. Now all we get are these old forkers replacing divots no doubt kicked out by those would be forkers doing the cross bar challenge.

 

Boo the forkers off that''s what I say![:@]

[/quote]

 

 

Or maybe fork the booers?    That would shut them up............................

 

 

 

[TIL 1010 4,718]

I went to B&Q the other day after some fork handles and they gave me four candles.I said no no no i want fork handles,handles for forks.

[Webbo118 0]

I believe some of them may speak with forked tongues.

[BlyBlyBabes 0]

Fork the forker forked a fork of forking forker

A fork of forking forker fork the forker forked,

Now if fork the forker forked a fork of forking forker

A fork of forking forker fork the forker forked!

 

OTBC

 

 

[Diesel Doris 127]

[quote user="TIL 1010"]

I went to B&Q the other day after some fork handles and they gave me four candles.I said no no no i want fork handles,handles for forks.

[/quote] The old ones are the best ones Mr T[:D]

[barclaystand 0]

Was just forking around on the forum looking for something worth reading and what do I find?A forking rubbish thread all about forking. I think I''ll leave you to it and just fork off! [;)]

[......and Smith must score. 1,332]

Stan Boardman knows all about forkers '' cos they bombed his chip shop...

[lake district canary 0]

I have heard from a good source at the club that the shovellers are up in arms about the way some posters on here are so biased in favour of the forkers.   Spades are just as useful as forks and the  shovellers would like it known they work just as hard in the winter when the snow is around and when they need to spread sand around the bare patches on the pitch.    

 

Apparently, the technique of shovelling is much more advanced than forking -  working on the surface without damaging the delicate area underneath.    With the fork, less face it, all you do is stick it in and wiggle it around  (its what teenagers do, when they get the chance!)    

 

Give me a spade any day, its a proper tool to do a man''s work...........forks are for  girls.................................

 

       

 

 

 

[ricardo 7,339]

I''m forked if I know.[;)]

[Rudolph Hucker 0]

Up in Newcastle they are celebrated. They''ve even got a son about them called ''the sod on the tine'' or something similar because I find it difficult to get past the accent.

[drurys testamonials V 15 0]

Talking about spades could put you on dodgy ground LDC!Thankfully we live in a more enlightened world these days.

[Dungcan Deadwoods 0]

How can a half wit be allowed to create a thread based on the ''hilarious'' use of a four letter word? When the Two Ronnies did it, it was funny and more to the point, original.

[lake district canary 0]

[quote user="Torchy"]How can a half wit be allowed to create a thread based on the ''hilarious'' use of a four letter word? When the Two Ronnies did it, it was funny and more to the point, original.
[/quote]

 

 

When the two Ronnies did it they were talking about ''fork handles''.  The op is making more of a play on the film title ''meet the fokkers'', so your analogy is pretty wide of the mark - as wide as your lack of  understanding for someone who is trying to introduce some humour to the board. 

 

Lighten up.   

 

 

 

 

[Dungcan Deadwoods 0]

[quote user="lake district canary"]

[quote user="Torchy"]How can a half wit be allowed to create a thread based on the ''hilarious'' use of a four letter word? When the Two Ronnies did it, it was funny and more to the point, original.[/quote]

 

 

When the two Ronnies did it they were talking about ''fork handles''.  The op is making more of a play on the film title ''meet the fokkers'', so your analogy is pretty wide of the mark - as wide as your lack of  understanding for someone who is trying to introduce some humour to the board. 

 

Lighten up.   

 

 

 

 

[/quote]So it''s not a play on words with the F word then?Silly me. [:|]