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WaldenCanary

Do your homework

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To those that have tickets for the Col U sections be prepared to answer some tricky questions at the turnstiles. I''ve seen this before, questions such as,

Who was Colchesters top scorer last season

What a certain players nickname is/was

Name one or 2 areas of Colchester town or housing estate names

What were the names of the stands at the old Layer Road ground

HaveCol U ever won any silverware :-)

etc etc etc

These are my guess at what type of questions they''ll be asking although I may be wide of the mark. I think it''ll be tough getting in but good luck, and behave!

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The answer is :- "Dunno, I''m just here with my mate, he''s more of a fan than I am, I''m here because of all the hype. I hate them Canaries, by the way"

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I am a Muslim/Polish and don''t speak much English (have it witten down for effect!)..............but have been a fan for two years....or sorry, I''m registered deaf!

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This is starting to sound like ''Allo Allo''.

''Lizen very carefully. I shall say zis only vunce''

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[quote user="Kathy"]This is starting to sound like ''Allo Allo''. ''Lizen very carefully. I shall say zis only vunce''[/quote]or..........I vos just pissing by the turnstyle.

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OK, so this is why you learnt a foreign language st school... to sneak into footy games NICE!! [:D]

Put head phones on...?

Just start slating (if you can bare it) Norwich as you approach the tunrstile...?

I like the idea of preternding to be deaf, try and get some sign language in there.

Could always go to the club shop and buy something cheap... there will be plenty of options and get the club carrier bag.

Please note that TESCOs bags do not count :)

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[quote user="First Wizard"]I am a Muslim/Polish and don''t speak much English (have it witten down for effect!)..............but have been a fan for two years....or sorry, I''m registered deaf![/quote]

That''s a good idea actually.Alternatively, say nothing and just wear a burka for the day.

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[quote user="B-ru"]OK, so this is why you learnt a foreign language st school... to sneak into footy games NICE!! [:D] Put head phones on...? Just start slating (if you can bare it) Norwich as you approach the tunrstile...? I like the idea of preternding to be deaf, try and get some sign language in there. Could always go to the club shop and buy something cheap... there will be plenty of options and get the club carrier bag. Please note that TESCOs bags do not count :)[/quote]

Crash course available cheap from myself!![:D]

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[quote user="Shyster"]Alternatively, say nothing and just wear a burka for the day.[/quote]A woman called at my house yesterday wearing one of those.............

I spoke to her through the letterbox to see how she f**king liked it! [H]

 

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[quote user="lappinitup"]

[quote user="Shyster"]Alternatively, say nothing and just wear a burka for the day.[/quote]A woman called at my house yesterday wearing one of those.............

I spoke to her through the letterbox to see how she f**king liked it! [H]

 

[/quote]

[:D][:D][:D]  [img]http://www.pinkun.com/cs_pinkun/cs/emoticons/emotion-21.gif[/img]

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Who was Colchesters top scorer last season - Not sure as I''ve been serving overseas for a few years - eh was it Jamie Cureton ?

What a certain players nickname is/was - Well he always been known as twinkle toes to the rest of the squad !

Name one or 2 areas of Colchester town or housing estate names - eh ? I''m an exile, and live in Swindon, do you want an area of Swindon?

What were the names of the stands at the old Layer Road ground - (having been there on an away trip) barside, main stand, Layer Road end and I think Clock end !

HaveCol U ever won any silverware :-) Not whilst I''ve been watching ''em !

AND THAT''S OFF THE TOP OF MY HEAD !

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here''s a few tips if asked, ie where you could claim to be living - villages/towns surrounding Colchester are Thorrington/Arlesford/Wivenhoe/Brightlingsea/Langham/Dedham

 Or closer in, Colchester has a Greenstead Rd,Bergholt Rd, Artillery St. If asked who the top scorer was last season you could be a bit flash and hit ''em with a bit of more ancient stuff - scorers in the win against Leeds in 1971 were Crawford (2) and Simmonds. They may say everyone knows that, in which case tell them Col U beat Rochdale 5 - 0 in the previous round, after a 3 -3 draw in the original tie at Rochdale. If they''re still not convinced remind them that Col U were 3 - 1 down with 5 mins to go in that game. Then get real flash by dropping names like Bobby Svark, Steve Cram, Brian Gilchrist, into the conversation, you could add Mike Walker or Steve Foley but that could be a bit risky due to the City connection. You could quote ex Manager''s names like Jim Smith or George Burley (don''t break into the "Daydream Believer" though or you will surely be sussed out)

Finally if the Essex Interrogation squad are still not convinced then tell ''em Col U are famous for winning the Watney Cup, beating West Brom 4 -3 on pens after a 4 - 4 draw in the game itself. If all that fails give up.

I will additionally have on my person utlity bills with a CO postcode and my birth certificate with place of birth being.....[:D]

Quietly confident of getting in to see the game!

 

 

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[quote user="WaldenCanary"]

To those that have tickets for the Col U sections be prepared to answer some tricky questions at the turnstiles. I''ve seen this before, questions such as,

Who was Colchesters top scorer last season

They scored a goal ?

What a certain players nickname is/was

Kevin Lisbie They call him the Binner

Name one or 2 areas of Colchester town or housing estate names

The Village Green, The Village Church

What were the names of the stands at the old Layer Road ground

Those are seating stands ? I thought it was a burger van......

HaveCol U ever won any silverware :-)

LMFAO

etc etc etc

These are my guess at what type of questions they''ll be asking although I may be wide of the mark. I think it''ll be tough getting in but good luck, and behave!

[/quote]Hope the answers help :)

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Just get down to the joke shop and get a fake tongue (with drool) to hang out the side of your mouth, some brown sauce up the back of your jeans, tea down the front of them and you''ll pass for a Colchester fan. Bonus is you don''t have to talk just grunt and groan...

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[quote user="B-ru"]OK, so this is why you learnt a foreign language st school... to sneak into footy games NICE!! [:D] Put head phones on...? Just start slating (if you can bare it) Norwich as you approach the tunrstile...? I like the idea of preternding to be deaf, try and get some sign language in there. Could always go to the club shop and buy something cheap... there will be plenty of options and get the club carrier bag. Please note that TESCOs bags do not count :)[/quote]

Who''s pretending,parden I heared that.

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ps - to any Col U fans wigging in, I will be in the Rose & Crown on Sat night after the game, with some of my Essex kith and kin. Feel free to buy me a pint, I will be the one celebrating an away win [:D] 

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