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Chunky Norwich

Your Job: Play-Your-Own-Adventure

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Let''s play a game. Imagine your job. The one you do from Monday to Friday or whatever it is. Now let''s pretend that you perform your job in front of thousands of people once a week. Like loads of people. About 25,000. And the weird thing is that these people absolutely love your job. They want your autograph, adore you, talk about you down the pub and discuss how best you fit into Tescos as a company - whether your best position is shelf-stacker or till operater. Y''know, the usual. So what motivates you to do your job better then? Do you:

A) Work in a company where your efforts are lauded whatever you do. The chairman of the company is a sweet old woman who sings your praises and refers to the friendly office where you work as a "family company". A few years ago, you were in the top 20 performing businesses/labourers/whatever in the country and you appeared in the national press quite a few times (although that lovely sweet old woman was caught giving an embarrassing, drunken speech at the Christmas party. Whoops!). On the last financial day of the year, you would have stayed in the top 20 performing businesses/labourers/whatever if only you''d performed your job capably and broken even. Hell, you could have made a loss and three other companies could still have gone down. Instead you cock it up and do an absolute botch job. Lovely sweet business woman gives you a pat on the head and sings your praises. Well done. Your customers and loyal fans also stick close to you. After all, who are they to criticise how well you do your job. Can they even do your bloody job? Hell no. Some of them demand better sales/painting jobs/work ethic but not too many. You''re still loved by the manager and the lovely woman and get paid a pretty penny. Besides, the vast majority of the fans still love you and continue to turn up in droves to watch you at work and applaud your efforts. A few managers come and go in that time but you''re still there, still on a long contract and still have the perenial support of the lovely old woman and the adoration of your admirers

B) Work in a company where the chairman demands 100% from you all the time. Not only that but the manager of you and your colleagues is a bit of a nut-job and you know that if he caught you slacking on the job, there''d be hell to pay and you might even be shipped off to one of the branches in Luton or Rochdale or, heaven forbid, Grimsby. Not only that but the people who turn up to watch you work also demand that you do your job properly. They''ve come all the way to watch you and a large chunk of your salary actually comes from them turning up to watch you and buying that lamp-shade. The one with your face on it, grinning behind your computer/fork-lift truck/lorry. Admitedly, some of them can be a bit fierce. Some even tie scarves around their wrists and yell nasty things at you when you have a bit of an off-day. You have cried once or twice in the past. The chairman demands that the company does well and he, the manager and the fans all want you to be in that elite list of top companies. This isn''t a family company that wants to be loved by all and sundry. It''s a company that rewards the people who watch you at work and it also makes the chairman and manager look good if you''re performing well. To hell with the other businesses you''re competing against.

So if you think you would be more motivated and give a better performance by working for company B, turn to page 73

If you think you would give a more motivated and better performance by working for company A, turn to page 109. Then hang around there for a few years before being released for free and playing for a non-league team.

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[quote user="Chunky Norwich"]

Let''s play a game. Imagine your job.

[/quote]Let''s play another one.  Imagine taking a poor innocent metaphor and squeezing every last drop of life out of it.

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[quote user="Mister Chops"][quote user="Chunky Norwich"]

Let''s play a game. Imagine your job.

[/quote]

Let''s play another one.  Imagine taking a poor innocent metaphor and squeezing every last drop of life out of it.
[/quote]

That sounds like my kind of game.

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[quote user="Chunky Norwich"]It was actually an analogy but what the hey! If I wanted to make a bad metaphor, I''d have a picture of Jesus as my avatar and then be a rude cock to people.[/quote]

[:D] Reality check Chops. ...don''t Mello

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Well My job is like norwich and the fans being Greenpeace, that complain and moan about everything because were not investing enough in building a sqaud or in my case build wind farms

 

Yes i work for Shell UK.

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