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Being Jan Kristiansen...

I Suffer From 'Riversisgood' Syndrome..... Help Me

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I am an a normal bloke who lives an avarage life. I have followed football and Norwich City all my life and can hold my own in a debate about who should play in Englands midfield or who would make good transfer targets (Hughes, Crouch, Riggott)BUT I still believe that Rivers is a talented player who can do a job for us in the Prem if he is managed properly even though the logical part of brain knows this is wrong.

Does anyone else suffer from the same affliction?

Is there a cure? (When iv seen him play bad my mind overides this image by bring back memories of him terrorising the Birmingham defence in Cardiff).

Do I have a chance????

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I agree as well...I get these thoughts too. I think Rivers just needs help on keeping his focus, b''caus when he is on form, he''s as good as any. He just gets lazy at times and needs to decide if he really wants it. Maybe after a long spell out of contention, he may have the fire in him to overcome this.

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The unfortunate thing with this affliction is that you have a number of fellow sufferers.

Is there a cure possibly a frontal lobotomy may work or perhaps time taken watching videos of players who work tirelessly and apply themselves to their trade.

You have my sympathy personally I have never suffered from this particular malady having never believed Rivers had any talent as wide player. But will grace City''s reserves next year, because if he were to leave guess it would have happened by now.

Perhaps Worthy suffers similar, he did waste £600k on him after all.

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Yes ''Turn To The Yellow Side'', it seems you have a serious condition. You can cure this by a simple shift in relativity as you are right in a way that Rivers is a good player. But only relative to the third division.

Once upon a time Rivers could be bothered, especially a couple of years ago. Sadly the second some competition came in for his position this season he gave up, looking at his chubby physique it would seem he spent his time away from the first team eating burgers.

Only a serious amount of effort over summer will propel him back into contention for the first team squad, personally I hope he makes it as he has the potential and I always like to see teams make the most of what they already have.

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Turn To The Yellow Side, the only cure for you, I fear, it to be dropped head first in the icy waters where the Wensum and the Yare meet. Then, and only then, will you be cleansed of the Rivers, and your rehabilitation can begin to prepare you for your future life in Premiership waters!

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True, his haircut does give him that footballer status, but I understand that his main affliction, and the reason why he has fallen spectacularly out of favour, aside from his temperamental form, is his fondness for Benson and Hedges, and his inability to even consider packing them up.

With Worthy the master of fitness and discipline, this has not been well received, and you have to say that smoking does not exactly enhance your athletic abilities, especially if you play out wide.

Anyone else heard this one?

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Fact with Rivers is that everybody else in that team plays for each other and all act like they care. He has had countless opportunities to take his chance and prove himself but we simply can''t afford to have a player like him who can only play ''on his day''. In recent performances he was bloody awful, come on guys, he looked like it was all too much effort so why should he ben given the chance to grace the Premiership after all his teammates carried him there? Worthy has proven himself to be a good man manager so Rivers obviously has a problem that Worthy can''t cure....so why should Nige bend over backward and give him special treatment. Rivers is a grown man and a professional footballer earning good money, that is all the motivation he needs. All the other players seem happy so it is not Nige or his team. If I conducted myself at work with such a mentality I would be out on my arse, you have to make it happen for yourself, I would be ashamed if my colleagues carried me. He is simply not good enough, considering that Cooper and Harper both came in on loan and did a better job says it all....dead wood...see you later......oy Clint...room in your car mate for another Wide boy?


ps. I am not exactly Rivers number one fan

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Just had a thought, Worthy should pick Rivers for Sunday''s game and tell the rest of the team to pass the ball to him at every opportunity. Hopefully it will be one of the days that he is up for it, he scores and makes a goal, Crewe are suitably impressed and agree to sign him up. I know Crewe were interested in taking him on loan earlier this season, so now is the chance to let them see what he has to offer. We can only keep our fingers crossed that this becomes reality and then Worthy should end up with the nucleus of a good squad.

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I heard, on the way to Sunderland, that its all academic anyway, because he is going back to Crewe.

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Sorry you are obviously incurable 3 words spring to mind ,lazy,lazy ,& lazy, none productive employees in the real world get the poke....need i say more!

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Sorry but there is no help for people with "Riversisgood" Syndrome for the simple reason that they don''t live in the real world.
In fantasy land there once was a winger who had speed and skill, who could beat his man and put in a telling cross, who could every now and then score a goal. There was only one like him, and he walked with pride in a winter wonder land.
Unfortunately it was only a dream, because in the real world he complained of "not being a naturally fit player"?? What the hell does that mean?? Perhaps as a professional athlete the fact that he smoked contibuted to his "not being naturally fit"??
Further, he was a bit of a wimp, and opposition defenders soon learned that all you had to do was give him a couple of heavy clouts and he would dissappear back into his dreamland where he took no further part in proceedings.
And so another "almost" player gave up his chance of making his mark, not because of a lack of ability or skill, but because of a real crappy attitude.
Basically, and tragically, Rivers is slacker and is destined to live in the shadows...hopefully far away from the sun that shines on Carrow Road.

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I think I suffer this too! you lot have short memories, he was very instrumental in our good start to the season, remember? scoring goals and all that sort of stuff! well he has had fitness problems and hasn''t been given a significant run in the team since then. People seem to think thats following injury you come back as a player and go out on Saturday full of confidence and play 100%, well this isn''t so, it takes time and with all the adverse comments it must hit a players confidence. I think they guy has talent, however it also seems like many football fans like to have some targets at their club they can mock and jeer however they play. It wasn''t long ago a substantial amount of fans were chanting for Iwan when Svennson was on the ball, a few goals later and it doesn''t happen so much. I think Easton got similar treatment. Players have off games, or indeed bad spells, why don''t we give them more support. Any of you lot play footy?

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Marty, we all know Rivers started the season well, but what about the two seasons of inept performances he gave us before that? I''m all for giving players a chance to settle in and prove themselves (I''ve always defended Svensson, for example), but two years to settle in?? For the amount of money he gets paid, his attitude stinks. Plus the fact I was never convinced he could cross - too many times I saw his final ball only reach the first defender or drift out for a goal kick.

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Early symptoms of ''Riversisgood'' syndrome were originally discovered in the ''Libraisclass'' virus. While this condition was not as serious (due to isolated nature of the ''Libraplayswell'' gene) it follows a similar patteren where those infected believe in the artistic but effective style of football (an example of this is that goal against Man City).

While sufferers may be slightly deluded about how to win football matches thay are quiet harmless and still can make usful contribution on subjects apart from ''Rivers should be playing on the right''.

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Marty, I''m completely against shouting abuse at our players. Even Easton. It''s clearly wrong.

What I am against is players who don''t look after themselves. If it''s true that Rivers smokes he''s an utter w****r. He should stand up at the start of next season infront of the snake pit and apologise for stealing money from the supporters who pay his wages, then hand money back to each and every one of us.

A player has an obligation to be fit enough to justify his wages, by smoking he is conciously not doing this and stealing money from us. End of story, no arguments.

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Marty if you thnk Rivers is as good as you say go and watch him in the reserves trying to win his place back.In the past posters have stated "we all know what Rivers is about" can somebody please tell me what that is,at the same time NW might have an interest so as to recoup some of the £600,000 he spent on him.The sad thing is he has ability but no heart,or desire and i for one cant wait to see the back of him.The fact we brought in 2 loan players and a 17 year old says it all.He''s history.

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Hayden''s point begs the question though - why WASN''T he in the car with Clint heading out of Norfolk? And just why didn''t he let him go to Crewe on loan? We so needed him in the final months. NOT!
Perhaps NW is gonna give him one more chance?

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So Mark likes a fag? So what dont most of us? Also whoever said he is stealing are money no this is not true!! Are all smokers stealing their employers money then?? No i dont think so im sure rivers is not the only smoker in the team and i no for a fact the rest of the team drink as well!!

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Sorry Jon, but a professional football player has no right to smoke when fans pay his exorbatant wages. Top class football players are only top class because of superior fitness and ability. There''s a fine line between the premier league class and the nationwide class of player, only a percent or two in it and players need to do all they can to edge over it. Smoking is quite blatantly going to drop Rivers below it.
He knows this and obviously couldn''t care less. If he smokes, he deserves to play for Crewe in the Nationwide instead of Norwich in the Prem. He has the ability to stay, obviously not the commitment.
I''ve no problem with you or me smoking, we know it reduces our fitness and life span. But we don''t get paid 5k plus a week to play football.
For every premier league football player there''s a thousand other men who would have loved to played there but couldn''t due to injury, fitness, family commitments, bad luck etc. They would gladly pull their own teeth out to have the chance that Rivers has.
I''m sorry but this is something which totally winds me up, I''d give anything to earn the cash Prem footballers do and would have done almost anything to play footie as a job. Unfortunately I was always crap at football. But Rivers has the ability and if it is true he smokes (which I haven''t heard confirmed) he''s an arse.

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Petit smokes, Cruff smoked while playing top class football, Gazza was known to have a few fags. Does not mean that they couldnt do a decent job on the pitch.

Having a a smoke is no more negative to your fitness than eating junk food, drinking booze.




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Sorry Turn To The Yellow Side. I just can''t accpet any argument which is for footballers smoking. It''s ridiculous.

Smoking can only reduce fitness. Fact.

Players know this, I know this, you know this. If a player smokes they need to be taken to one side and told just how lucky they are to be in the position they are in. To smoke is to help throw it all away.

As we have seen there''s always a player just behind them waiting to take their place, in the case of Rivers, Hendo or Cooper. Even McVeigh out of position. There''s a fine line between being fit enough and not being fit enough. If smoking takes Rivers down just a couple of percent then it will surely cost him his place to somebody fitter.

Are you really saying that you don''t mind seeing the players we pay eating junk food, boozing and smoking. Seriously? If so you couldn''t be more obviously wrong. I want to see Norwich become a top class side, to do that we need top class players. Not players who are unfit to wear the shirt because they can''t be bothered and show utter contempt to the fans by smoking.

I don''t know about Cruyff smoking, but I wouldn''t be surprised if Paul ''Kebab'' Gascoigne did. What did Bobby Robson once say about him? ''Daft as a Brush'' wasn''t it?

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"Having a smoke is no more negative to your fitness than eating junk food or drinking booze!!!"

I am sorry, but that is total rubbish.

There are approximately 600 chemicals in your average cigarette, chronic respiratory risks, heart disease, you name it.

It is all about choices, and although great players may have smoked, it does not make it the right thing to do if you are professional sportsperson.

Think of how much better they would have been if they hadn''t.

Players like a drink, most of us do, but although drinking is not great for you body in excess, moderate levels have benefits, both physical and mental.



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They shouldn''t smoke, drink or eat junk food. They''re being paid vast sums of money to be at the top of their respective sport and that means they have to keep fit. I''m not paying my money for shares / tickets etc for players to smoke it away. Even if they only feel 0.1% less fit for the final 5 minutes it makes a difference.

As for wheover said he could be a Super-Sub...I think you know you''re wrong :) Here''s a player who cannot get in the first team of a first division club and who has only played recently against the likes of Colchester Reserves. He''s also a player who for whatever reason cannot get in the team despite the manager watching him play probably every day. There must be a reason for it. If he has to go he has to go. I''ll stick by whatever NW decides.

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