My call to Sky re Free Bet.

[arrdee 1]

Now this a true account of my phone call to Sky , people who know me  will tell you that I don''t make things up and I always tell the truth.

Arriving home the other day I was greeted at the door with the glad tidings from my daughter "the computer is down, page cannot be displayed" my blood ran cold , If ever there was a set of words designed to kill man these were it , indeed they could wipe out nations , "you have to ring Sky dad" "whats that gone wrong as well" I began to worry what disasters had overtaken the arrdee household in my absence"no Sky are the providers of our Internet" "mum is ringing the number " I allowed myself to be ushered to my computer and plonked down in front of it . "There you are its ringing" said my wife thrusting the phone in my hand , I suddenly though what am I doing ?I know nothing about computers this is going to be humiliating for me , I have to get rid of this phone quick , I swiveled in my chair only to see my wife and daughter backing towards the door as if reading my thoughts , I was on my own.

This voice came on saying "can I help you"? In what I can only describe as belonging to Peter Grants brother , I could hardly make him out ,"yes my computer wont work all I can get is page cannot be displayed" "Is your rota on sir" my heart sunk surly my Free Bet rota wasn''t the cause of my problem , I went on to explain how I needed my rota to inform the Pickers whose turn it was to make the final selections on the Free Bet , I even promised him a good drink if I could keep my rota . "I don''t know what you mean sir" ah-ha I thought I was going to be the ignorant one but no no no I had the advantage he seemed not to know anything about the Free Bet , I was away now I was telling him how Yankee had become the first winner and how he had won two weeks on the bounce . "Am I suppose to know what you are talking about sir"  "you asked me about my rota on the Free Bet" "ROUTER"  "alright Granty no need to shout my ear is ringing my good one as well".

"Right Granty where do we find this router all I have got on my screen is page cannot be displayed there are no bits and bobs around the edge"  "no sir its a piece of equipment that will be somewhere near your computer probably higher than your computer to aid your signal it will have a small Ariel on it" . I don''t know I cant say I have seen anything like that , I was looking all over , Ah-ha  "do you mean that white thing perched on top of a pile of books and empty cake tins"? At this point this banging started which at first I thought was them trying to repair my computer from their end but the more I listened it sounded more like someone slapping their hand on a desk and I could hear this gurgling noise , It suddenly came to me they were horsing around having little wrestling matches amongst themselves , someone had got Granty in a head lock and that''s why he couldn''t talk and he was slapping the desk in submission.

When Granty had recovered from the stranglehold or what ever it was he came back on with "how many windows have you got sir" "well just the one in this room but I can open the window if you think it will help your signal to get through rather than butting up against the glass" Again came this slapping noise and it sounded as if someone was crying , I hoped they hadn''t been too hard on Granty .

"No I mean on your computer Sir" oh dear I was in trouble now as I haven''t got a clue "Don''t bother sir you have got Vista" well I thought if you know why ask . "Can you turn off your computer sir"? I was on my home territory now "Yep done that" "Well done sir" "Is your monitor off as well"? "It most certainly is" "Well done sir" uumm two well done''s on the trot I felt I was picking up the points now after a sticky start . "Whats next Granty" "Sir my name is not Granty ,would you mind not calling me that ? that''s the sixth time you have called me that"  "Sorry Gr...I didn''t realise I was .

I seemed to have drawn a crowd I could hear them all a round the phone at this stage , I thought that''s what arrdee likes lots of social cohesion everyone trying to get arrdee back on line . As Granty seemed to be refusing to talk to me I handed the phone to my wife telling her Granty has gone all tempermental on me , Ruth was pulling leads out plugging them back in , Ruth told me to turn the computer on and there she was the Pink un message board , Yes Yes my babies arrdee was back on line . I could hear Ruth saying "thanks ever so much" I motioned to her to give me the phone , she said" hang my husband wants to thank you" I got the phone and shouted down it with all my might GRANTY GRANTY GRANTY and then turned the phone off .

So be on your guard if you think you have got Granty on the line don''t call him that what ever you do because he is sure to turn baxxard on you . [:D] arrdee.  

 

[Nuff Said 5,088]

Top post Arrdee, keep it up!Sorry, forgot myself for a minute there... <adopts humourless whinging tone> what''s that got to do with Norwich, this is a football board, blah blah blah...

[Joanna Grey 0]

It''s even funnier from the other end though....used to work across the office from the tech support guys, they would always turn the phone to loudspeaker when there was an idiot on the other end....great laugh!

[Buncey 1]

Hahaha. great stuff RD! [Y]

[colneycanary 0]

Very good arrdee! This has just cheered me up and shows me there is someone more stupid than myself on here!! LOL!

[James Kent 0]

Ah that was classic just what we need with all the doom and gloom around.

[Budgie 0]

Interesting read, ardee.I have always found the Sky engineers remarkably helpful whenever I have had problems with the television.But the annoying thing is what happened after Sky advertised free broadband if you have a tv package I jumped at it. Well think of the savings.So I registered only to receive a reply a fortnight later saying that broadband was not available in the Cromer area. Whether they meant literally or just under their offer I failed to ask. I was just stunned because I have been on broadband for many years now.A little later I received a letter outlining Sky''s broadband package - and with the assumption that I was going to fall over myself to get it!So, confusion and annoyance. Where I go to from here I do not know.

[dickyst220 0]

Great  post cheered me up no end, considering all the other (undestandably) miserable posts I am reading today.....

 

Classic arrdee..... perphaps you should write a book !

[......and Smith must score. 1,332]

Nice one Ardee.....

As a middle aged all-at-sea-with-technology '' Victor Meldrew '' myself I really love customer call centres. They always try to grind you down so it''s fun to get your own back sometimes.

Some years ago I bought a TV from a well known electrical retailer on a six month credit deal. Soon after the six months had elapsed I got an unsolicited call from a young girl from the same finance company - her name escapes me but it must have been Sharon - who said that I had been specially selected to receive a new loan and she was certain that she would be able to beat the previous interest rate. I happily egged her on, letting her read all the spiel on her prompt card before telling her that, unless she was going to pay me to take the loan, she wouldn''t be able to beat the previous deal as it has been at 0% !

For some strange reason she quickly lost interest ( if you''ll excuse the pun ).....

[Pete Raven 276]

I''m on Sky Broadband too Ardee and have also had similar accent problems with their technical ''support''. I find unplugging and plugging the "rota" back in again does the trick should your connection drop out.

[Syteanric 1]

[quote user="bunny"]It''s even funnier from the other end though....used to work across the office from the tech support guys, they would always turn the phone to loudspeaker when there was an idiot on the other end....great laugh![/quote]

you used to work for sky??? that explains a lot....

jas :)

[Joanna Grey 0]

[quote user="jas the barclay king"]

[quote user="bunny"]It''s even funnier from the other end though....used to work across the office from the tech support guys, they would always turn the phone to loudspeaker when there was an idiot on the other end....great laugh![/quote]

you used to work for sky??? that explains a lot....

jas :)

[/quote]

Not SKY, bigger than them.....

[Evil Monkey 52]

Ardee, Ardee, Ardee... I''m sitting at work eating my dinner and reading Pinkun and I have to put down my fork cos I was laughing so much... classic post, as always, and I can just imagine the conversation taking place.  Shame "Granty" didn''t have enough of a sense of humour to enjoy the experience more, but at least you and we got a good laugh out of it, cheers [:D]

[arrdee 1]

[quote user="Budgie"]Interesting read, ardee.

I have always found the Sky engineers remarkably helpful whenever I have had problems with the television.

But the annoying thing is what happened after Sky advertised free broadband if you have a tv package I jumped at it. Well think of the savings.

So I registered only to receive a reply a fortnight later saying that broadband was not available in the Cromer area. Whether they meant literally or just under their offer I failed to ask. I was just stunned because I have been on broadband for many years now.

A little later I received a letter outlining Sky''s broadband package - and with the assumption that I was going to fall over myself to get it!

So, confusion and annoyance. Where I go to from here I do not know.
[/quote]

Now "Budgie" It must be available to you because I am not that far from you in location  and we are enjoying free phone calls at the weekend on our land line which was part of the deal involving signing up with Sky on a one year contract which was  cheaper than anyone else .[Y] arrdee.

[Pete Raven 276]

Budgie,

That will more than likely be the ''free'' broadband that Sky is advertising - it''s also not available in Norwich - hasn''t been for the last 18 months and won''t be for the foreseeable future by the looks of it. You should still be able to take up their ''Connect'' offer though which is what I''m on, and am guessing Ardee is too, for £17 a month. Of course, other broadband packages are available...

[arrdee 1]

[quote user="Web Team - Pete"]I''m on Sky Broadband too Ardee and have also had similar accent problems with their technical ''support''. I find unplugging and plugging the "rota" back in again does the trick should your connection drop out.[/quote]

Yes I think you could be right Pete , despite all the hulabalo I had with Granty basically all Ruth done was pull out the plug on the router and leave for 10 sec , therefore  resetting it all , see I am learning fast . Thanks Pete my old mate. ( we go back don''t we Pete?) [Y] arrdee.