Jump to content
Sign in to follow this  
HappyhammerAndy

What level of conduct is acceptable at kid's matches?

Recommended Posts

We''ve all seen it  either, directly or indirectly. Parents &/or coaches shouting, swearing and almost coming to blows over their child''s Sunday morning game. Does this occur at games you watch?

On Sunday, at my place, the opposition coaches had their heads locked together, swearing, and threatening each other whilst, the poor kids stopped warming up, and looked over in disbelief. 

Does the parent''s actions influence the kids in anyway? Where does supporting the child cross over and become perhaps, detrimental?

Do some of the parents who, have never played the game themselves, live out their ego through their kids, what do ya think?

Should clubs be more responsible for spectator''s behaviour?

Do you have any comments on Kids Sunday football matches.

Andy.    

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
No uncomfortably long hugs, team baths, butt-slapping, wearing of long, brown raincoats hat & sunglasses or sitting on Coach''s lap.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think they should definitely cut off liquor sales at these games by half time.

I think most parents who live vicariously through their kids'' sporting exploits certainly DID play when they were young. They likely weren''t very good, but you betcha they played.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Adults should be setting the bloody example at kids games but they rarely do! I played for a team as a kid and we had a really good team that had been together since a young age and were all mates but our coach unfortunately died and we got an idiot take over who swore at us all the time. We were like 11/12. The team disbanded shortly after, disgraceful.

In America they go mental over it don''t they?!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
What I find upsetting is that you can''t go along to watch your child play and take a photo of them without asking the permission of every other parent there!!!! CRAZY!!  Can you imagine the conversation further down the line, "Dad, why don''t you have any photos of me playing football?" "Because it''s against the law to take a picture of your own kid scoring a goal son"

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

pick up the latest issue of 4-4-2 magazine and read the article on kids football...

Insisting that Parents stay silent on the side lines is a good place to start

 

jas :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You cannot be serious about it being illegal to take photos in public parks of kids playing footy.  If that was the case, tourists would be getting rounded up and thrown into the justice system all over London for taking pics withouth asking everyone around if it was okay.

What happened to freedom of speech, anyways.  It includes being free to be an offensive jackass, not just the freedom to say niceties.  Parents are not RIGHT to do this, but the HAVE the right.  Saying they should not is tantamount to supporting communism. if you ask pretty much anyone who ever lived under communism (except Stalin), it was a nightmare of fear and repression.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You cannot be serious about it being illegal to take photos in public parks of kids playing footy.  If that was the case, tourists would be getting rounded up and thrown into the justice system all over London for taking pics withouth asking everyone around if it was okay.

What happened to freedom of speech, anyways.  It includes being free to be an offensive jackass, not just the freedom to say niceties.  Parents are not RIGHT to do this, but the HAVE the right.  Saying they should not is tantamount to supporting communism. if you ask pretty much anyone who ever lived under communism (except Stalin), it was a nightmare of fear and repression.  Even at professional events the people would only appluad politely when their athlete or team did well.  You might want to rethink what you wish for, you just might get it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
It''s probably one of the areas where the academy system has got it right. The behaviour of parents at academy schoolboy matches of all ages right around the country is far better than in the junior leagues. It''s achieved at Norwich City by a code of conduct for the parents and some education as well.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
[quote user="Eastside Canary"]

You cannot be serious about it being illegal to take photos in public parks of kids playing footy.  If that was the case, tourists would be getting rounded up and thrown into the justice system all over London for taking pics withouth asking everyone around if it was okay.

What happened to freedom of speech, anyways.  It includes being free to be an offensive jackass, not just the freedom to say niceties.  Parents are not RIGHT to do this, but the HAVE the right.  Saying they should not is tantamount to supporting communism. if you ask pretty much anyone who ever lived under communism (except Stalin), it was a nightmare of fear and repression.  Even at professional events the people would only appluad politely when their athlete or team did well.  You might want to rethink what you wish for, you just might get it.

[/quote]Yup. it''s true, if parents are told not to swear at children''s footi matches, it''s tantamount to communism.... is asking people to clean up their dog sh*t tantamount to Nazism, or how about PC gone mad? We should be very worried.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
[quote user="Eastside Canary"]

I think they should definitely cut off liquor sales at these games by half time.

I think most parents who live vicariously through their kids'' sporting exploits certainly DID play when they were young. They likely weren''t very good, but you betcha they played.

[/quote]Are you an underground hip-hop fan?![quote]And now i live vicariously through my kids

Like people who love the sport, but can''t play for s$%t .Immortal Technique, Never Know Why.[/quote]more than a passing resemblance to your post....

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

If it is a LAW then it is freddoms being taken away by government.  If a private organization has rules, then fine, that''s their choice when they are on their private property.  It''s when the government tells you what you can and cannot say that it become dangerous.

 

SPat, your confusing common decency with individual, natural rights. Either that or you''rer one of those who wants Big Brother to run your life for you so you don''t have to. If a parent gets loud and obnoxious at my kids'' games, the other parents will tell her to pipe down. There is no need to call in Johnny Law, which seems to be your solution.  People are social beings, so it is very unlikely anyone will keep up anti-social behavior on their own.  If it is a group, then they are disturbing the peace and freedom of speech does not come into play there, so go ahead and call the cops.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
[quote user="Happyhammer/Andy"]

We''ve all seen it  either, directly or indirectly. Parents &/or coaches shouting, swearing and almost coming to blows over their child''s Sunday morning game. Does this occur at games you watch?

On Sunday, at my place, the opposition coaches had their heads locked together, swearing, and threatening each other whilst, the poor kids stopped warming up, and looked over in disbelief. 

Does the parent''s actions influence the kids in anyway? Where does supporting the child cross over and become perhaps, detrimental?

Do some of the parents who, have never played the game themselves, live out their ego through their kids, what do ya think?

Should clubs be more responsible for spectator''s behaviour?

Do you have any comments on Kids Sunday football matches.

Andy.    

[/quote user="Happyhammer/Andy"]I can say that, as a recently qualified Level 9 referee that all encounters with parents at matches I have officiated before (11 aside and Mini Soccer) have been extremely positive. In fact I am going tomorrow morning to officiate and coach at the Mini Soccer games nearby, so I will post about any parental disturbances.Wish me luck [:)] (first game as an "official" referee, though I have done a few before completing my test yesterday)Rct2mad

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

As an U11 team coach of a team who have not won a game all season,but are moving forward and instilling good habits into the boys, I deplore the disgraceful abuse thrown at kids by several coaches and ( some) parents.

However, in our league, there are a number of club officials who ref games who are , shall we say, less than unbiased. In situations like that, I can understand frustrations.

 

But I can never excuse any type of abuse or chastisement of kids of that age. It borders on child abuse and one coach in particular has been reported to the league by our club for exactly that. FFS it`s a game and kids should be taught fair play and enjoyment as well as the ability to win or lose with dignity. So many parents who were sh!t at football try and live their dreams through the kids  can`t handle the fact that the kids aint any better than they were!!

Also, the parents of academy kids seem to think their boys have a god given right to kick out, stamp and foul their way through a game and not be pulled up for it. I see this at U11 and U13 level every week and it really p!sses me off. 

 

Rant over ! Feel better now!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Maybe Immortal Technique copied off me, did you ever consider that possibility?  I have no idea what Immortal Technique is, a band, a singer, a rapper, a mnusic company, I don''t know.  I don''t want to know either, so don''t waste your time trying to educate me on hippo hopp. 

My comment was not a terribly original thought, so the idea it may appear elsewhere in pop culture is not very extreme. Now, if I had said it was time for Norwich City to dig in their heels and see how it feels to raise a little hell of their own, THEN you could say I was using Trooper''s "Raise a Little Hell" because those lyrics are almost word for word, except the song is in 2nd person and I wrote them in the 3rd.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My younger brother (when he was 12) was a reasonable centre-back but was sent off in a match for a late tackle - not malicious, just late.  The player was up and about, if hobbling a bit.  Don''t get me wrong, it was a yellow card, borderline red card.   However, immediately, the manager of the oppo team (about 40, shell suit) ran onto the pitch and started bawling at my brother, which then started a punch-up with the manager of my brother''s team who ran on to defend him.  The referee and I ended up pulling them apart, and since that point my brother has lost all interest in football and now plays in games with his mates over the park - "jumpers for goalposts" and all that. So that didn''t work out quite so well.

It is adults taking the whole thing far too seriously, "living the dream" and thinking that if they can just get Catton Grove u12''s to the final of the p*sspot cup, Chelsea will be knocking on the door.

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
i used to coach at under 10s and to say some of the parents were competitive is an understatement. i remember one particular game where a manager was f''ing at his keeper and when i challenged him about it he said its ok hes my son!!! couldnt believe it. gave it up shortly after as i didnt want to see that at that level.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
[quote user="Eastside Canary"]

Maybe Immortal Technique copied off me, did you ever consider that possibility?  I have no idea what Immortal Technique is, a band, a singer, a rapper, a mnusic company, I don''t know.  I don''t want to know either, so don''t waste your time trying to educate me on hippo hopp. 

My comment was not a terribly original thought, so the idea it may appear elsewhere in pop culture is not very extreme. Now, if I had said it was time for Norwich City to dig in their heels and see how it feels to raise a little hell of their own, THEN you could say I was using Trooper''s "Raise a Little Hell" because those lyrics are almost word for word, except the song is in 2nd person and I wrote them in the 3rd.

[/quote]the song would have to be pretty new in order for that to work!clearly i know nothing about rock and visa-versa with you and hip-hop. dont get offended, horses for courses mate!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

After I had submitted this topic, I realised that I had used the word "kids" in the title and that it could be construed as relating to just mini football and the like? The intention was to provoke debate for all age groups up to 16. Hopefully, more might contribute some of what they have experienced. My Son is 15 and has been playing at a sunday "set up" since the age of seven. Currently, he plays for Essex, District, School and Sunday team. As you''d expect, as he moved through the age groups, standards on and off the pitch detiorated. Although, a long time ago, I played much of my football in the tough Dagenham leagues. I was no angel, but this a new level to me, which  occurs on a far too regular basis.

Here are some examples of games in the last week only!!!!

Shenfield School V Barking. Their teacher speaking on the touchline to his lads,  "We''re never gonna f.....g well get anything here, their PE teacher is a ...... cheat. You have to win twice to stand any chance of getting a draw". Unfortunately though, he was probably right. Are these the examples, that we want our teachers to teach our children? Incredibly enough, their coach did nothing as his kids swore, spat and threatened. the oposition. "Break his f.....g leg", came the call from the right back. "Do ''im do ''im, from the centre half." And this is from a team, playing in the last 32 of the Nationals!!

For Essex - Parent''s involvement unbelievable. It''s as bad as some of the antics at Upton Park on a saturday. 

In yesterday''s sunday game against Corringham. Dangerous tackles flew in and parents shouted a load of footballing rubbish.. And, then we wonder why our kids don''t develop like those on the continent?

I agree totally, ywith your last paragraph.

What''s the worst anybody''s encountered on this?

 

  

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
[quote user="Eastside Canary"]

If it is a LAW then it is freddoms being taken away by government.  If a private organization has rules, then fine, that''s their choice when they are on their private property.  It''s when the government tells you what you can and cannot say that it become dangerous.

 

SPat, your confusing common decency with individual, natural rights. Either that or you''rer one of those who wants Big Brother to run your life for you so you don''t have to. If a parent gets loud and obnoxious at my kids'' games, the other parents will tell her to pipe down. There is no need to call in Johnny Law, which seems to be your solution.  People are social beings, so it is very unlikely anyone will keep up anti-social behavior on their own.  If it is a group, then they are disturbing the peace and freedom of speech does not come into play there, so go ahead and call the cops.

[/quote]

I''m not confusing anything. I actually don''t want the government telling anyone they can''t say what they like, swear, anywhere, ever. However, if they did it wouldn''t be tantamount to communism. There''s always a line to be drawn somewhere though, do you think people should be able to fly-tip or leave dog-sh*t in the road?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

 You are correct about my knowledge or lack of it, regarding the hip hop music. However, I was just being silly, so no offense was taken.

I just find these overly serious social issues on NCFC pages rather pointless, and certainly not in the right place for consideration. As such, I make silly comments in regards to them, as do several others of like mind.

Hopefully the Canaries can beat Watford tonight the way some of the parents and coaches are accused of doing to their young ones.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
[quote user="Eastside Canary"]

You cannot be serious about it being illegal to take photos in public parks of kids playing footy.  If that was the case, tourists would be getting rounded up and thrown into the justice system all over London for taking pics withouth asking everyone around if it was okay.

What happened to freedom of speech, anyways.  It includes being free to be an offensive jackass, not just the freedom to say niceties.  Parents are not RIGHT to do this, but the HAVE the right.  Saying they should not is tantamount to supporting communism. if you ask pretty much anyone who ever lived under communism (except Stalin), it was a nightmare of fear and repression.  Even at professional events the people would only appluad politely when their athlete or team did well.  You might want to rethink what you wish for, you just might get it.

[/quote]

As a level 3 coach, level 2 gk coach, welfare officer, FACA member and LTPD rep I''m gonna add my tuppence worth to this conversation.

The behaviour of adults in childrens football is probably the biggest single problem that i have to deal with in coaching, the kids are as good as gold - even the teenagers, whereas the language and behaviour of the parents quite often is disgusting and nothing short of bullying - something that is classified by the FA as being child abuse.

There is a fantastic article in Insight, the FA Coaches Association handbook from last summer, by the FA LTPD coach John Allpress which I have used and given to every parent of the teams I coach, its about children being free to play, to experiment and to learn and develop from their mistakes on the pitch. It is no wonder that some of the most talented creative and exciting players to watch come from cultures, such as Brazil, Portugal and Africa, where kids go out and kick a ball about. They practice skills, they mess about, they copy what they see older kids doing and they develop that way. Over here we have structured coaching sessions for 6 year old kids, we take the fun out of football, we stop them when they make mistakes and we coach based on our own experiences, rather than letting kids develop their own experiences.

I include myself in getting things wrong, the FA Coaching courses are like driving tests, you learn and practise what you need to do to pass the test, having a level 3 coaching badge doesnt make me a better coach than i used to be, in fact its only since I have been responsible for LTPD (long term player development) and actually stopped to think about what I was doing that it all starts to make sense.

I believe, and I have every parent of every child that plays for our club, signed up to the following principles:

Mum and Dad please:
- Give me the time and opportunity to make my own decisions both on and off the field - I need to learn the consequences of getting it right and wrong.
- Try not to tell me off or shout at me from the sideline when I do get things wrong. Give me the chance to relax and play - I need the mistakes to help me learn
- Try not to keep offering me advice going to games or coming home again. Let me unwind and reflect - it helps me learn
- Listen to me if I come to you with a problem - sometimes I just need someone to talk to - it helps me learn
- Remember I am a young person not a small adult - sometimes I don''t see things like you do or understand what you are saying
- Come and enjoy the game - I''ll always try my best.
- Please love me for being me - not just for the things I can do.

As for the photography, it is not illegal to take photographs on public property, however it is advisable to ask if anyone has any objections first, especially if you are not a regular at games. On private property it is illegal to take photographs without prior permission of the club.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this  

×
×
  • Create New...