Animal attacks

[Richard Richard 186]

Sky news reporting that a kangaroo has killed a man in Australia for the first time since the 1930s.

Clearly not funny but just wondered if anyone else has been subjected to unwanted animal attention (oo-er) that resulted in minor injury or just amusement for those around to witness it?

Bored, on the bus after work heading back out towards Yarko, desperately trying not to inhale the body odour of the old fella behind me 🙄.

Also - have been out on the inflatable kayaks a bit this summer - where did "a swan can break a man's arm" come from?! Was it carrying a baseball bat?

[Richard Richard 186]

I'll get my coat......🤦

[Thumbbass 318]

19 hours ago, Richard Richard said:

Sky news reporting that a kangaroo has killed a man in Australia for the first time since the 1930s.

Clearly not funny but just wondered if anyone else has been subjected to unwanted animal attention (oo-er) that resulted in minor injury or just amusement for those around to witness it?

Bored, on the bus after work heading back out towards Yarko, desperately trying not to inhale the body odour of the old fella behind me 🙄.

Also - have been out on the inflatable kayaks a bit this summer - where did "a swan can break a man's arm" come from?! Was it carrying a baseball bat?

OK I've been searching my brain so I can kick this off for you. Not me, but my friend used to do his paper round before coming straight to school. One morning he walked into class caked in mud and something else. A large and rather randy male dog took him down off his bike while at full pelt (trying to escape said dog) and left him a deposit on his trousers. His shirt was torn and he'd tried to clean the j1zz off but the school's tracing paper towels weren't up to the job. 

[Mr Apples 1,318]

I got butted by a sheep climbing a hill in Scotland. The b*stard waited for me to pass and then charged me from behind (it was protecting a lamb)...luckily it wasn't witnessed, but I don't know who was more sheepish. I proceeded to then walk backwards until it was out of sight in case it fancied a second go and at least I could swing my boot at it.🐑🦵🤣

Apples

[Richard Richard 186]

That's the spirit!

I got attacked by one of my step-daughter's house rabbits (stupidly fluffy kind) last year. We bought two and the little b******s continually tried to tear lumps out of each other. One day the more feisty of the two took exception to me walking past it in the living room. It ran ahead of me, turned round and faced me for a second and then attacked my trouser leg in a frenzy. I resisted the urge to launch it across the room, sustaining a serious, non-repairable tear in my trouser leg in the process.

Both good as gold after having the snip. The former feisty one died suddenly though. I was at work. Honest.

[Herman 9,750]

My brother got run over by a friendly Great Dane when he was a kid and hasn't liked dogs since. In fairness it was twice as big as him.😀

[The Raptor 1,205]

Not actually attacked but a cow made me fall off my bike. Was cycling along and as I passed this gap in the hedge there was a cow standing at the gate.

It moos at me which catches me totally by surprise as I couldn't see it until it was right next to me. I instinctively swerved out of the way and lost my balance. Ending up in a heap in the road. 

[Mr Angry 1,554]

I nearly got attacked by Chris Sutton’s dog when I was delivering an electoral roll form to his house during the time he was at Chelsea. I also got bitten on the thumb by a Jack Russell Terrier that I tried to stroke, again delivering an electoral roll form.

[dylanisabaddog 4,906]

I was chased by a Fresian in the Peak District and had to throw small dog over a wall and climb over it myself. I told the tale to the butcher in Hartington and he told me that 2 years earlier the farmer had gone out for an evening walk with his dogs. The 2 Labradors got home safely but he was later found dead having been trampled. 

Apparently what I should have done was to let the dog loose because a cow will chase it rather than you, and probably not catch it. 

[ron obvious 1,502]

Fishing with my dad we slowly realised a herd of bullocks grazing nearby were gradually hemming us in. Worse, they were getting quite frisky & unpredictable; I seem to remember starting to climb a tree at one point. Luckily my dad found that banging two sticks together scared them a bit & made them back off, so we were able to pack up our gear. I'd gone on my bike & he'd arrived later in his Anglia Estate (!) & was giving me a lift back. Anyway, I walked slowly back to the car with the gear while my dad wheeled the bike some distance behind banging the sticks as best he could until suddenly one of the following herd broke ranks & went at him.

I'll never forget the expression on dad's face, his little legs going hell for leather as he ran with the bike. What made it funny was that the bullock stopped dead in its tracks as he did so with what I can only describe as a bemused look. Could have been very nasty though if he hadn't & his mates had joined in.

Nigh on 60 years ago that was. ..  Just call me Granpa Simpson.

[sonyc 5,509]

Hornet for me. Massive one. Had read that they had invaded France whilst on holiday and that two people stung had died. Gulp. Playing keepy uppy with my eldest on a massively flat French beach when... you've guessed it, a hornet wanted to join in. I was wearing red swimming shorts and decided to run to the sea. The problem being that the sea was a good 100 yards away (the memory may have exaggerated over time🙂). Each time I looked round to see if it was gone, it was actually chasing me. As I got to the sea I thought to myself "you'll not like water you bas****". But....25 yards into the water it was still there. Nothing for it but to dive in. When I surfaced it has flown off.

Mrs S recalls it even today. She had even seen the hornet watching from her towel and had never seen me run as fast. She even laughs out loud today and cannot contain giggling if the subject of hornets comes up on TV or radio.

It was scary I can definitely vouch. Needless to say I hate those bug***s (and Watford FC almost as much for even the stupid word association. Give me a Canary any day - because they saved lives).

Edited September 15, 2022 by sonyc

[ron obvious 1,502]

On 14/09/2022 at 17:05, Richard Richard said:

That's the spirit!

I got attacked by one of my step-daughter's house rabbits (stupidly fluffy kind) last year. We bought two and the little b******s continually tried to tear lumps out of each other. One day the more feisty of the two took exception to me walking past it in the living room. It ran ahead of me, turned round and faced me for a second and then attacked my trouser leg in a frenzy. I resisted the urge to launch it across the room, sustaining a serious, non-repairable tear in my trouser leg in the process.

Both good as gold after having the snip. The former feisty one died suddenly though. I was at work. Honest.

Had to be done

 

[Richard Richard 186]

16 hours ago, sonyc said:

Hornet for me. Massive one. Had read that they had invaded France whilst on holiday and that two people stung had died. Gulp. Playing keepy uppy with my eldest on a massively flat French beach when... you've guessed it, a hornet wanted to join in. I was wearing red swimming shorts and decided to run to the sea. The problem being that the sea was a good 100 yards away (the memory may have exaggerated over time🙂). Each time I looked round to see if it was gone, it was actually chasing me. As I got to the sea I thought to myself "you'll not like water you bas****". But....25 yards into the water it was still there. Nothing for it but to dive in. When I surfaced it has flown off.

Mrs S recalls it even today. She had even seen the hornet watching from her towel and had never seen me run as fast. She even laughs out loud today and cannot contain giggling if the subject of hornets comes up on TV or radio.

It was scary I can definitely vouch. Needless to say I hate those bug***s (and Watford FC almost as much for even the stupid word association. Give me a Canary any day - because they saved lives).

Funnily enough we had a hornet fly into our living room last week at dusk. Wondered what the hell it was, nearly took my head off! Fortunately, and to save me having to frantically shepherd it back outside, it flew straight into the very hot lightbulb in one of the uplighter wall lights and appeared to have died instantly - well it kept still as it started to smoke! Had to extract it with a pair of tweezers as the smell wasn't particularly pleasant! Huge thing, obviously European though (had a passport) 🙂

[Richard Richard 186]

1 hour ago, ron obvious said:

Had to be done

 

Great clip Ron! Reminded me very much of Bart (RIP)!

[Herman 9,750]

On 15/09/2022 at 18:01, sonyc said:

Hornet for me. Massive one. Had read that they had invaded France whilst on holiday and that two people stung had died. Gulp. Playing keepy uppy with my eldest on a massively flat French beach when... you've guessed it, a hornet wanted to join in. I was wearing red swimming shorts and decided to run to the sea. The problem being that the sea was a good 100 yards away (the memory may have exaggerated over time🙂). Each time I looked round to see if it was gone, it was actually chasing me. As I got to the sea I thought to myself "you'll not like water you bas****". But....25 yards into the water it was still there. Nothing for it but to dive in. When I surfaced it has flown off.

Mrs S recalls it even today. She had even seen the hornet watching from her towel and had never seen me run as fast. She even laughs out loud today and cannot contain giggling if the subject of hornets comes up on TV or radio.

It was scary I can definitely vouch. Needless to say I hate those bug***s (and Watford FC almost as much for even the stupid word association. Give me a Canary any day - because they saved lives).

I remember this tweet from Kathy Blake. She had no problem with them but I am sure 99% of the rest of the population would have.

 

[Rock The Boat 1,329]

Sat by poolside at a hotel in Phuket Thailand when a snake leapt right over my legs with its mouth wide open and its fangs bared. Fortunately it wasn't targeting me but some birds on the ground to my left

On another occasion at home I spotted a snake trying to slither under my house and I grabbed its tail to stop it disappearing. I was then in a tug of war with this thing and you'd be amazed how strong this creature was even though it was a young un. I had to call my kid to bring me a hammer but for some reason she brought me a pair of pliers, so I broke the snakes back to kill it. 

We called security and they took the dead snake away and ate it. 

[sonyc 5,509]

5 hours ago, Herman said:

I remember this tweet from Kathy Blake. She had no problem with them but I am sure 99% of the rest of the population would have.

 

The hornet chasing me was sort of red and black and about 4 to 5cm long. In other words, huge. Best photo I could find is attached. Lots of stories in recent years about the Asian Hornet (from China originally) and they have now started to make a presence in the south of the UK. Not great because they eat bees.

 

Red is the colour of danger I thought at the time!

 

[kick it off 1,948]

Theres a show available if you dig the depths of the Internet called "Kings of pain".

2 seasons of 2 guys getting deliberately stung/bitten by insects and animals and rating the level of pain caused by each. Reticulated python bite is insane.

Weird show but compelling viewing.

Edited September 17, 2022 by kick it off

[Richard Richard 186]

21 hours ago, Rock The Boat said:

Sat by poolside at a hotel in Phuket Thailand when a snake leapt right over my legs with its mouth wide open and its fangs bared. Fortunately it wasn't targeting me but some birds on the ground to my left

On another occasion at home I spotted a snake trying to slither under my house and I grabbed its tail to stop it disappearing. I was then in a tug of war with this thing and you'd be amazed how strong this creature was even though it was a young un. I had to call my kid to bring me a hammer but for some reason she brought me a pair of pliers, so I broke the snakes back to kill it. 

We called security and they took the dead snake away and ate it. 

You're a brave man RTB! Where were you living when the snake tried to get under your house? 

Closest encounter I've had with a snake is one sliding over my trainers in the back garden whilst painting a bit of trellis (how middle-aged do I sound & feel?!). Mrs Richard was walking toward me with a cuppa and spotted it first. She jumped out of her skin and so I jumped out of my skin too before even seeing the thing! Pretty sure it was a good-sized grass snake (although we do have adders round here).

Don't mind them too much. Mrs Richard has to pause before she steps out of the front door after finding one basking in the sun there one morning!  Not a fan 🙂

Sounds a bit lame after your snake-wrangling story!

 

[canarydan23 4,060]

For the greater good of the country, we should release some cows, hornets and killer kangaroos on those idiots queuing. A modern form of natural selection.

[Rock The Boat 1,329]

10 hours ago, Richard Richard said:

You're a brave man RTB! Where were you living when the snake tried to get under your house? 

Closest encounter I've had with a snake is one sliding over my trainers in the back garden whilst painting a bit of trellis (how middle-aged do I sound & feel?!). Mrs Richard was walking toward me with a cuppa and spotted it first. She jumped out of her skin and so I jumped out of my skin too before even seeing the thing! Pretty sure it was a good-sized grass snake (although we do have adders round here).

Don't mind them too much. Mrs Richard has to pause before she steps out of the front door after finding one basking in the sun there one morning!  Not a fan 🙂

Sounds a bit lame after your snake-wrangling story!

 

Hi RR 

This was in Thailand. Snakes lived in the sewers where it cooler and damp. If we had rain at night you could guarantee there would be something venemous in the garden the next morning. I had to replace the grass lawn and shrubbery borders with ceramic tiles so as to not give them a resting place. Snakes were a real nuisance, the wife once found a couple of cobras in the kitchen. We knew how to deal with them but more worried about our two dogs getting bitten. 

 

 

 

[Mason 47 1,376]

I've fought off two animals in my life, an Alsatian, and a goat called Cream. I didn't expect both of these to be at the same end of the threat meter and yet...