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City 2nd

Don’t shoot the messenger!

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A man went into sports direct last Tuesday.

He asked for some condoms and KY jelly!

“We are a sports shop” said the assistant.

He went in on Wednesday and asked for a Black vibrator,

Thursday some **** beads and a gimp mask, Friday some love

eggs and a whip, but always receiving the same response from the sales assistant!

As he walked into the store on a Saturday the same sales assistant takes him to one side and says:“Mate you keep coming in and it’s getting embarrassing, you know we are a sports shop, what do you really want”

The man summoned up all his courage and took a deep breath and blurted out

“Can I have an Ipswich Town home shirt please”

 

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Funnily enough I rang the ticket office at Portman Road the other day to ask when their first game of the season is. “When can you make it?” they said 

Edited by Canary Jedi

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It appear the binners are so skint they are having a blanket collection in the autumn

The club are hoping for a few thousands ................................. blankets

Enough for one each

For the few fans left watching games through the winter

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Their U23s played Coggeshall at the weekend, 3×30 minutes, after the second period the referee bu€€ered off and they ended up with the subs running the line. 

FWIW, they lost...... of course they lost. 

Edited by splendidrush

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17 minutes ago, splendidrush said:

Their U23s played Coggeshall at the weekend, 3×30 minutes, after the second period the referee bu€€ered off and they ended up with the subs running the line. 

FWIW, they lost...... of course they lost. 

Jesus Christ, I thought you were taking the **** with that, but I checked to make sure and it's actually true. 

"Harry Jell, Town's academy strength and conditioning coach, stepped in and took the whistle and a sub from each side - using a coloured bib as a flag - ran the line."

And yeah, they lost 4-2, but I'm sure some of them will make their mark on League One this season.

Edited by Wacky Waving Inflatable Arm Flailing Tube Man
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