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Keith Scott

A few jokes to lighten the mood.

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Norwich city fan walks into a bar .meets a Dundee utd fan ..how is your team doing these days jock ? Well our manager is Scottish and shite like yours . what''s the punch line ? 😀

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My mate Mick the plumber, got in big trouble while working in Buckingham Palace.

He was caught doing something unspeakable to one of the Queens dogs.

It was ok in the end, turns out he was Corgi registered.

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Ipswich fan going for a job with a farrier

Have you had any experience shoeing horses the farrier asks

No he replies but I once told a donkey to f.ck off:)

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I always go the extra mile.

The restraining order says I have to.

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What do you do if your wife is running around the garden bleeding from the head?

Reload and fire again

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You''ll pi55 yourself at this one:

Train Main Aik Husband Apni Wife Se Bola: Tujh Se Shaadi Kar Ke Pachta Raha Hoon,

Ji Karta Hai Tujhe Kuttay Ke Aagay Daal Doon.

Itnay Main Saamnay Wala Musafir Bola: Bhaaow Bhaaow

I wish I''d thought of that one.

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A bloke walks into a bar with a giraffe. He goes up to the bar and orders 2 pints of lager and 2 shots of whiskey. The barman give him a strange look, but serves him none the less as he''s got money. Then he and the giraffe both down a pint and whiskey each and the bloke orders that same again. Despite his reservation the barman serves him again as he wants to see where this is going. So for about 45 minutes the bloke and giraffe keep downing pint and whiskey, one after another until the giraffe falls over drunk. The bloke picks up his coat to leave and the barman shouts after him "Oi mate! You can''t leave that lyin'' there!" To which to bloke turns round and replies "That''s not a lion, that''s a giraffe."

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