OT. Long Summer too much to do how do I get to watch the Ashes.

[BroadstairsR 2,273]

As this forum has become a bit agony aunty I thought I would seek advice as well.

Two lawns to mow, two hedges to trim, house to sell, daily cycle ride, two games of golf a week, Open Golf on Sky, my new Android box full of good Westerns and lots more, Kindle to charge, spam email to bin, Times crossword to attempt, pub quiz night every Tuesday, Isis and the Greek problem to worry about and Tescos still doing cheap Fosters Lager.

I am getting very concerned that I might miss some crucial moments of the up and coming Ashes series.

Advice please.

Apologies to Dead Canary.

[Move Klose 303]

Well cricket is f u c k I n g awful so I wouldn''t worry about it.

[kick it off 2,062]

[quote user="Oh Cameron Jeroooooooome"]Well cricket is f u c k I n g awful so I wouldn''t worry about it.[/quote]

Agreed, there aren''t crucial moments in the dullest sport in the world. It''s impossible to stay awake for an entire game anyway, so you will miss it even if you watch it to be fair.

[BroadstairsR 2,273]

"Well cricket is f u c k I n g awful so I wouldn''t worry about it."

Try telling that to the millions around the Globe who will be glued into it.

Well, it''s advice and could be well heeded.

Thanks Claire.

[Herman 11,136]

Be damned you Philistines!Test Match Special will be stuck on my modern-fangled radiogram set all summer. Until Geoffrey Boycott''s endless moaning makes me put my foot through it.

[Daz Sparks 1,558]

[quote user="BroadstairsR"]As this forum has become a bit agony aunty I thought I would seek advice as well.

Two lawns to mow, two hedges to trim, house to sell, daily cycle ride, two games of golf a week, Open Golf on Sky, my new Android box full of good Westerns and lots more, Kindle to charge, spam email to bin, Times crossword to attempt, pub quiz night every Tuesday, Isis and the Greek problem to worry about and Tescos still doing cheap Fosters Lager.

I am getting very concerned that I might miss some crucial moments of the up and coming Ashes series.

Advice please.

Apologies to Dead Canary.[/quote]

As I see this RB, you have to reduce the number of your problems, and think laterally.

1. Lawns & hedges

2. Sell house

3. Cycle ride

4. Golf

5. Golf on Sky

6. Android box

7. Kindle

8. Spam

9. Times X-word

10. Pub quiz

11. Isis & Greece

12.Tesco''s cheap Fosters

& The Ashes

Some time freeing solutions could be as follows.

1. Could be solved by employing someone from 11. So that''s 2 down.

2. Could solved by raffling it when attending 10.

3. could be solved by cycling to procure 12.

4,5 & 7 should combined by using your Kindle to watch the Golf while playing Golf. (NB, Kindle can be put on charge whilst Cycling to Tesco to buy beer)

8. Spam- Easy, let it pile up, spam boxes eventually reach a level and delete stuff on their own.

9. Wait till next day and just fill in the answers from today''s solution.

All that remains is 6, and the Ashes, which you should now have oodles of time to watch, in fact after adopting all my suggestions you may well need to find a summer job. [;)]

[BroadstairsR 2,273]

Thanks Daz.

I''ve taken all that in and will contemplate doing some apple or cherry picking in the nearby orchards.

The extra pennies will come in handy, plus some of those Polish and Romanian girls look good, especially from the bottom of a ladder.

Perhaps cricket is boring after all.

[lake district canary 4,830]

Record all the matches and then watch them during the long and tedious international breaks in the premier league season and get outside and do something useful during the summer instead.  

[Tetteys Jig 851]

I definitely wouldn''t trust someone from ISIS with a striker, they''re a little bit clumsy!

[Tetteys Jig 851]

Strimmer*

[Katie Borkins 1]

Cut the lawn during the tea interval or lunch break.

Bike ride before start of play or after close.

Westerns before bed.

Prioritise cricket over golf.

Sell the house another time.

Or carry on and get Dead Canary to watch the Ashes for you and then give you a 100 word daily summary.

I will be listening to or watching every ball and hoping our top order get enough runs to make it a contest. Suspect we will find it much harder to take 20 wickets than the Aussies will.

[Grant Holts Moustache 113]

Slack off all of the dull stuff. The westerns will wait until winter. Let someone else sell the house. Maybe I could? Actually no I would be a terrible salesman. Stock up on cheap beer. Put your feet up and watch the ashes. Everything else can wait.

That or just do things when rain interrupts play. Which if it''s in England will be most of the time.

[Mr Angry 2,019]

Watch the first 3 Tests, we''ll be 3 up and then you don''t need to watch the last 2.

[Katie Borkins 1]

As a side note, Fosters Gold is passable but "standard" Fosters (the blue tins) is to lager what Justin Bieber is to music.  Spend the extra pound or two and go for Peroni, or convert to the Moorland Brewery''s "Old Golden Hen".  At the very least, Heineken is preferable.

[BroadstairsR 2,273]

I go for quantity rather than quality.

Fosters might well be chemically enhanced chicken piss, but it goes down well with me.

Seriously though, this Tesco cost cutting, loss-leading, or whatever you call it, on cheap alcohol is gradually changing drinking habits it would seem. It very rapidly disappears from the shelves, and I should know.

I would never buy lager in a pub, especially Fosters, preferring real ale any time.

It becomes quite drinkable in-house and in front of the television screen or the laptop.

Popping a can is much easier than faffing around with soggy tea bags in any case.

[lake district canary 4,830]

[quote user="Bor Bor Bor"]As a side note, Fosters Gold is passable but "standard" Fosters (the blue tins) is to lager what Justin Bieber is to music.  Spend the extra pound or two and go for Peroni, or convert to the Moorland Brewery''s "Old Golden Hen".  At the very least, Heineken is preferable.

[/quote]

It''s "Morland".

Don''t mention it.

[Katie Borkins 1]

It''s "tosspot."

You''re welcome.

[lake district canary 4,830]

[quote user="Bor Bor Bor"]It''s "tosspot."

You''re welcome.[/quote]

Ahh.  Like to correct others, but don''t like to be corrected yourself.  Says it all.

[morty 0]

[quote user="Bor Bor Bor"]It''s "tosspot."

You''re welcome.[/quote][:D]

[Katie Borkins 1]

[quote user="lake district canary"][quote user="Bor Bor Bor"]It''s "tosspot."

You''re welcome.[/quote]

Ahh.  Like to correct others, but don''t like to be corrected yourself.  Says it all.

[/quote]

As long as you insist on picking fights and starting sh*t with me, I will do the same to you.  Stop being aggressive with me and I will stop being aggressive with you.  I am just here to talk about football and all I want to do is be treated the same as any other poster here.  However, some people see my name on a post and instantly attack me, rather than the points I am making. When people do that, I will attack them back.  If people think they can belittle me or push me about then they are wrong and I will continue to argue with them and stand up for myself.

If you are here to talk about football and respect the opinions of others, fine.  If you are not and want to troll me then that''s fine too but I will give as good as I get.  And let''s not forget, it was you that started it.