Rudolph Hucker

Nice one AIY, Got a couple but won''t post the solutions to let it deservedly run. Can''t help but think there is a hidden truth in some of these anagrams. Incidentally did you know a certain club turns out to be ''Wow! Pic''n sh*t.'' Must be something to do with team selection.

Breaker, So glad you seem to hate the current shirt. I wish we HAD worn it at Fulham and then it''s place as the unluckiest piece of attire could have been well and truly confirmed. ''Players like the loose collar.'' Oh Yeah! So why does Deano wear a virtual polo necked tee shirt underneath his? I seem to remember he was the original model as he sat polishing the bonnet of a Proton with the shorts and probably thinking the top could do a similar job. Still not as bad as the all yellow, heavy when wet, flannel job but I still can''t wait to see a new strip, with a sensibly placed badge and a neckline which doesn''t look like it has been ripped by a dangling groupie. We will struggle to win anything in this shirt.

Glad some of you liked the conundrum I hope the message handlers got my revised No.2 One last one for you: 7). Moist Larch non? Once I''ve finished my basket I am thinking of designing a new game entitled ''Worthy Suduko.'' The basic concept is that you only make use of your numbers one to nine, put them all in the box in a bewildering array of combinations and end up exasperated because you''ve tried to use the same one twice in a similar position.

Sorry about number two. I was getting my bed bath at the time so was a little distracted. I had matron check this one and it is a correct version of No.2. 2). Oui! Juste! A la hit men

The championship is full of innoculous teams who we take too lightly because we haven''t heard of most of their players and sort of respect their supporters as real fans. They see Norwich as a big club with players who have played in the premiership and a match with us is an occasion they want their players to rise to. This has to change, let''s want to annihilate the opposition, Luton is a good team to begin with. Ten reasons why I hate Luton: 1). They ended out 1959 cup run after we had already beaten the best opposition. 2). This season at their place. 3). For always being featured on our regional TV sports bulletins and programmes. They didn''t even qualify for the ''Willhire Cup'' remember. (You can include Northampton Town in this too). 4). For ''Match Of The Week'' with Gerry Harrison. As a lad I thought Luton was somewhere local as their matches were always featured. 5). Tinkering with the plastic pitch concept. 6). For occasionally wearing orange. 7). For being a place associated with the mist ridiculous looking car of all time: the Vauxhall Chevette. 8). For being one of three places in the UK with the same name when there is only one Norwich. 9). They are Mercians. Eastern Angles unite and cast these invaders back whence they came. 10). Have you been there? Enough said. Yes, three points are vital, but at this moment in time each match is a cup final, let''s show this bunch what a real match atmosphere feels like and drive our lot to bust a gut whether they want to or not.

Perhaps Nigel thinks Norwich will launch his career; help him earn a winners medal;see him flatter to deceive; suffer an injury subject to speculation and conjecture; play well for half a season; bottle it when the pressure is on; look to jump ship and feather his own nest and finally the club off in the media. Perhaps he has the same agent? Player of the season said the media. Fortunately enough fans had more sense.

Substituted players who walk  off applauding the fans to slow the game down.

To my mind a winger is not just a forward, he has to have a solid defensive side to his game too. Ruel Fox, for example, developed this and became a much better player. As for the last winger this had to be Kevin Harper and the last permanent winger? Try Neil Adams. Ian Henderson has been used on the right wing, probably because he was considered too small previously to play up the middle, and this started his detractors off because he wasn''t taking full back on a la Huckerby. Worthy has bought a lot of strikers and tried to make them wingers, we all know who they are. Incidentally Kevin Cooper was left footed and was played on the right while Huckerby is right footed and plays on the left: perhaps Worthy likes his wingers to cut in rather tan go around the outside. As fo Huckerby, his defensive attitude and his use of his full back is so poor he doesn''t deserve to be called a winger either.

See if you can make footballers out of this lot, some have tried and failed. Personally I''ve looked at formations; looked at positions; read the runes; studied the birth charts and considered every sit'' uation but to no effect. So, before the nurse comes to take away my laptop for the night and makes me take my medication here are some conundrums; as Richard Whiteley used to say. 1). Come! Liken Zen. 2). Et tu lose. U in a jam. 3). Nothing Winter (log). : 4). Jet rat on jars. 5). Hurry back re: Den. : 6). And sh*t one (put in an asterisk and the missing letter is an ''a''). 7). Her gay. Do try. 8). Huge shandy (my favourite as it''s so true).  

All these attempts at formations just highlight the fact that Norwich have no effective right winger; and have not since Kevin Harper. Any team you pick is lop sided and Ashton gets little service from the flanks. Drury is a good full back unfortunate to be regularly exposed by Huckerby who also fails to see his runs and pass to him. We only need a new central midfielder because what we have got fails to do the job. The value of Francis was that he would run into the gap caused by the centre half doubling up on Huckerby. Jarrett has done it a couple of times, let''s hope Etuhu does it all of the time. We need a clear out! Team for saturday:                                                           Green                                      Fleming       Doc    Davenport    Drury                                              Henderson   Etuhu      Safri    McVeigh                                                      Ashton  Thorne Subs: Ward, Colin, R. Jarvis, Brennan, Huckerby

Funny how successful sides suffer less injuries, everyone is match fit and players under pressure for their place tend to turn up and perform. It''s no use having a team of willing workers with no skill but as we find; it is less use having a squad of so called quality players with other aspects missing. Out of 10 then for Ability, Creativity, Spirit, Fitness Reliability and Playing to potential: Green 8,6,9,9,6. = 38/50  76%  Bags of ability but punch-drunk. Needs a rest. Louis Jean: Has let an average player claim his place. Drury 7,6,8,8,6. = 35/50  70%  On his day 78% and suffers with Huckerby. Shackell 7,6,7,4,5. = 29/50  58% Would have got 76% last season and has a lot to prove on his return. Fleming 7,6,9,9,8 = 39/50  78% Tried to mark the old man hard but you can''t question his professinalism. Huckerby 8,8,6,8,5. = 35/50 70% Too many errors. In the past 86%. Use sparingly in a relegation scrap. Jarrett 7,7,6,5,6 = 31/50  62% Would like to think he is better than this but Hmmmm! Thorne: Unable to assess. Marney 8,8,8,4,7 = 35/50 70%. Not bad out of position but sadly crocked. Ashton 9,9,9,7,6 =  80% 40/50 Lost confidence and needs a strike partner who doesn''t sit on the left wing. Brennan 7,7,7,7,7 =  70% 35/50 Solid, pity he isn''t a right back. Ward: Unable to assess Mckenzie 7,8,9,4,5 = 33/50  66% Usually an 84%. We need the old Leon back soon. Safri 9,10,9,5,8 = 41/50  82% If always available would be in the 90% bracket more strains than a tea lady. Charlton 7,7,7,7,6 =34/50 68% and we''ve got more wide left than Old Labour, lopsided? Yep! Hughes 6,6,10,6,7 = 35/50 70% If only effort was all it needed but certainly one for a scrap. McVeigh 8,9,7,8,6 = 38/50 76% The iPod, compact and clever, needs a run in the side partnering Ashton Henderson 7,7,8,7,6 = 35/50 70% Not sure where to play him, wide right is free (always) sorry Hendo! Colin 6,5,7,8,6 = 32/50  64%  Edworthy would have received 78%. Forward is that way! No! That way! Doherty 8,8,9,9,9 = 43/50 86% One of the few worth the shirt. Wonder how he''ll play without Davenport? Davenport 8,8,8,8,8 = 40/50 He must be counting the days...No doubt about his inclusion though 80% + Straight in the side: Ashton, Safri (if fit and not in Africa), Doherty and Davenport. If no Safri then no automatic choices for midfield. 75% + In the side if no better direct replacement: Green, Fleming, McVeigh. Any wonder the last two have been tried in other positions. Still no midfield. 70% + Worthy''s worries: Drury, Huckerby, Marney (but no more), Brennan, Hughes, Henderson. One central midfield scrapper, one absentee, two left backs, a striker and an enigma. Under 70%  Worthy''s woes: Jarrett, McKenzie, Charlton, Colin, Shackell. Two poor acquisitions a journeyman and, hopefully, two potential members of the Lazarus Club. It looks like Hobsons Choice. How did Worthy allow himself to get into this ''situation''  (that really is his fault). The midfield is poor with only one automatic who is regularly unfit or absent. The right side has no specialist player and the left either has someone who can''t/won''t defend or vice versa. With the exception of long term absentees Marney, McKenzie and Shackell my team would be Ashton, McVeigh, Brennan, Safri, Hughes, Henderson, Drury, Docherty, Davenport Fleming and Green with sub''s of Ward, Huckerby, Colin and Rossi Jarvis. They would be sent out with a defensive mindset. This team is chosen out of necessity rather than choice and there is very little flexibility for abstractions (except on the left). Otherwise, I think it''s time to give the youngsters a chance, at least they will be hungry for it!  

Forget the protests, recriminations, and blame game. Never mind the AGM or Nigel Worthington. We are one point outside the relegation zone with a month of away games coming up,Davenport goes back to Spurs at Christmas and Safri goes to the African Nations Cup in the new year for up to two months. Ashton could depart in January. Confidence is low and our players are playing with a handicap of fear of making mistakes. If you still see Norwich as a team which should be challenging for promotion then the expectation will weigh you and the players down. This club (and that means the supporters and the civic position enjoyed by this emblem of our City and County) is in a precarious position and involved in a relegation battle with a £20 million debt burden. The Cardiff match is a vital three points not a platform for protest and if you approach it with an underdog mentality you will not only enjoy it more but will thereby lift the team.

Hucks is an enigma. He can win you matches, however, he won''t head the ball, he gets caught offside so often it is criminal, he doesn''t release the ball quickly enough, he frightens the full backs but this includes those in his team who he plays in front of, he is too inclined to go it alone-despite what he says about setting up others- this is just an excuse for not scoring enough goals and most concerning he simply does not learn from his mistakes. He is unpredictable but often all too predictable. Hucks has had so many clubs for a good reason, managers look at him and are impressed, they try to assimilate him into a team and the balance goes and he will not adapt. Worthington has made him more inclined to work back harder but he is often leaving his own defence exposed - remember Fulham away? Remember too Ruel Fox who did improve the defensive side of his game and became a more complete player. Hucks may have deservedly earned his place in the Norwich Hall Of Fame but Norwich City have been especially good for Darren Huckerby, he would never have played so many Premier League games had he not made the move to an upwardly mobile Championship side.

The underlying reason for the Premier League failure and the struggle since is the loss of key characters. 1). Iwan Roberts. Should have been retained and used as and when as he galvanised the squad on and off the pitch. (Worthys decision). 2). Malky Mackay. Another real prescence. (Worthys decision). 3). Mark Edworthy. Intelligent and inclined to have a view. (Worthys decision). 4). Paul Crichton. Another real personality. (Worthys decision). 5). Matty Svensson. Enthusiastic. (Probably not Worthys decision). 6). Gary Holt. Struggled in the prem but a no-nonsence pro and 100 percenter. (Worthys decision). 7). Leon Mckenzie. Still here in body but seems to be somewhere else. (God knows). Thank god for Safri and Hughes, the former was underused in the Prem and the latter is clearly a ''Worthy Man'' which is what you seem to need to be if you want to say anything nearing an opinion in NCFC. Why is it Premier League clubs hold on to older established players like Cooper at ''Boro. Is it perhaps because they are valued for the continuity and CHARACTER they provide?

Poor results, difficult circumstances, regular personal abuse from away fans, arguements with home fans, ongoing ridicule over her pitch performance last season, constant media kitchen cliches etc etc..... Has the lady had enough? Nigel is apparently a close friend. Our club owner wears her heart on her sleeve and she obviously feels criticism. Careful Norwich fans or all the vitriol might just cost you more than you think. Something has clearly been wrong at the club for some time now, there are too many instances of players publicly saying otherwise. Delia doesn''t even look happy when we win. I remember the club falling apart after its last real high: Europe. The adjustment to falling out of the Prem has been badly handled, are things beginning to unravel again?  

Further to my observations and tribute to ''The Doc'' here is the full version of his song.... and it''s still ''Daydream Believer.''   Oh! He''s on fire Every match Though his roof has little thatch His tackles? No alarm: he''s never late As he brings, down to size Hull defenders - see him rise His header hits the net The Barclay sings   Dah! Dah! Dah!........   Gary Docherty Rise majestically He''s no Mad headless chicken He''s just Bald Eagle-eeee.   We all thought we''d see Norwich go down timidly Now we know things change so rapidly And our good times start again As we''ve learned how to defend Through Davenport and slimline Docherty Dah! Dah! Dah!....... (Repeat chorus)  

Gary Docherty is a born again defender and Norwich are half a striker short, discuss. I can feel another Daydream Believer moment, hang on, it''s coming....... Aaahhhhh!!!!!   Gary Doc-er-teee Heading gingerly He''s no Sad headless chicken He''s more Bald Eaglee-eee!