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  1. Hi Norwich fans, Yesterday I cooked the usual meal of five chicken balti Pukka Pies followed by a chocolate cake. But Grant didn''t turn up. As I''m sure you can imagine, this distressed me greatly. Grant always comes straight home after training. I then decided to phone Paul Lambert. Mr Lambert was very polite, but unfortunately his voice sent me to sleep on the phone and I was unable to absorb the information he gave me. My eyes shut and I fell backwards, cracking my head on the kitchen floor. When I awoke an hour later, Grant had still not returned home. The chicken balti pies were now cold, so I decided to eat them one after the other. Despite not being warm, I enjoyed the flavours of the chicken very much indeed and this settled my nerves a little. The chocolate cake was equally satisfying. I still feel rather guilty about eating Grant''s portion - I fear that if he finds out about it, he will refuse to speak to me, so I am taking a big risk in contacting you all. At 8pm the phone rang. I picked up. It was Mr Lambert again. He said something about ''squad rotation'', but I missed the rest as I was sent straight to sleep by his voice. When I awoke, I noticed that ''The Biggest Loser'' was on television. To my shock, my Grant was standing there, looking very emotional. Apparently they refused to allow him to take part due to ''medical reasons'' and he looked rather upset. I have to say, I was quite relieved that they wouldn''t let him participate. I watched the last series and it did involve an awful lot of running. I''m not sure my son would cope with that. He''s never really liked moving about. If the competition involved pushing people over and falling to the floor, I''m sure Grant would do incredibly well, but as it was something else, I think it''s best if he stays at home with his Mummy. I still haven''t heard from Grant and am starting to get very worried. He did look very upset on the TV. I don''t want him to lose weight. He already attracts very beautiful women - in fact I saw him out with Delia just the other day. Please, please, if any of you have seen him, let him know that I''m very concerned and that I''ve packed his lunchbox for tomorrow''s training session. I''ve put ten packets of Dorito''s in as a special treat. Yours sincerely, Ms Holt xxx
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