Montgomery Bumpkin

Why? Why not a frisky newcomer?

I would be happy to pay up to £18.00 per month to be part of the vital, cosmopolitan forum. I would like to see moderators re-introduced and would put myself up for the job - no posts from Yarcos or Lahhhdahhnahhhhs!

Yes, they should bring back invalid carriage behind the goal. Also the Norwich and District Pipe Band for half time entertainment.  And sweet trolleys - "Sweeeeeeeeeeeeeets!". And Canary and Dumpling

Kids and no marks from Yarmouth who never go to games. At least there won''t be any London-based fans there, thank god!

Was on the decrepit old semi-circular terrace at the Bridge when Beassant commited career suicide. Still one of my favourite ever away games. As I recall the team bus got stuck in traffic with the players having to get changed on the bus and only getting to the ground just on time.

I refuse to have anything to do with this kangaroo court

They''re actually seperated co-joined twins - that''s why Robert keeps his hair longer to hide the scars. I used to go train-spotting with his uncle who texts me constantly.

If you floor it, you could be back in the Fine City by 8.00. Stuff Sunny Scunny and hot tail it back to Naarrrridgge for beers!

And he was going out with Stephen Gerrard''s bird''s sister!

Will you stop texting me

Did his uncle play for Benfica as well? Did he know Eusebio?

Yes, yes I could. But at least I''d be shutting up in the throbbing loins of the Fine City, not in lah-di-dah, fancy dan, faraway Lahhhhddaaahhhhnnnn!

Your eyes are getting heavier, you''re feeling very sleepy. When you wake up you''ll remember nothing (but your underwear may be back to front). I admire your dogged pedantry. The ground was never inside the Ring Road (well Newmarket Road and the Nest were) but it was ON the Ring Road. I must admit to feeling slightly queasy on crossing from Koblenz Avenue to Carrot Rud but what can you do?

The Ground hasn''t moved. Carrow Road hasn''t moved. The Ring Road has moved - toally new bit of road opened up at the time of the Riverside redevelopment. Koblenz Avenue. Have you ever actually been to the ground? Are you some sort of Lahhhnnnddddhhhannnnn-based imposter?

Until some communist planner dreamt up Koblenz Stalingrad Phnom Phen Avenue, Carrot Rud used to be the Ring Road