We`re not Worthy

End of Season Away Supporters Party Report   Another season over and we are invited by The Stowmarket Two, to the End Of Season bash. Most of the squad were there and below is a report of the evening   Peter Grant    was present and when asked about the evening he spoke via interpreter Bryan Gunn. He was particularly disappointed with the service of the catering staff. He singled out two bar staff as totally unacceptable. “Unfortunately” he retorted, “ I inherited these people and I will be searching high and low in the coming months for replacements”.   Paul Gallacher             was all set to attend the Supporters Party but his invite was sent to Ashdown who couldn’t make it so Lee Camp was asked. He turned it down, Marshall was busy in Scotland and Tony Warner was back in London. Eventually Norwich legend Kevin Keelan was the goalkeepers` representative. Word has it Grant ask Keelan what his employment plans are from August onwards.   Matthieu Louis- John     was hoping to attend but snubbed his toe getting out of the bath. Latest indications suggest he should return to training in 18 months.   Adam Drury               Ever dependable Drury with a small orange juice in hand, not a whiff of scandal- in fact unbelievably boring. Started tapping his feet when a Kenny Rogers song was played. Gary Doherty             Three deep at the bar and caused a lot of animosity in the queue by having his arms all over the man in front. Asked for bitter shandy, as he has done week in week out, an excellent choice   Andy Hughes                Ran into the room like a man possessed geeing the DJ and bar staff up with his indomitable style. Spotted at the bar buying a round but ended up giving the drinks to the wrong people   Youssef Safri              Absent. As he was getting ready to go out he pulled a stomach muscle whilst doing up his tie. Hoping to be back by September before joining up with Morocco.   Darren Huckerby      All hell breaks loose as Daz, fresh from his Player of the Year award falls over on the way to the bar. Players and Supporters have to be separated by Doormen and Stewards. Huckerby argues with anybody who will listen that he is the innocent party in all of this. James Hanson, aged 4 from Wroxham is accused of delibrately tripping Hucks up and is escorted out of the room and banned from attending matches indefinately.  Constant booing every time Hucks visits the toilet mars the remainder of the evening. Members of Wroxham under 5`s are warned about their behaviour   Robert Earnshaw            The diminutive Welshman caused a scene when asked to produce ID at the bar. After a lengthy discussion with the Bar manager he was able to buy his drinks. His delight at this decision was plain to see. Commence celebrations. Unfortunately jubilation turned to horror, as during his back flip two elderly Canary fans were knocked unconscious. After treatment from Neil Reynolds, Earnie was helped up with only a sore toe for his troubles.   Paul McVeigh            Started off the evening with impeccable behaviour, and even got an autograph from Jake of CBBC fame. Unfortunately after drinking to many Orange Fantas became completely uncontrollable, running up and down the room  and sliding on his knees across the dance floor. Grantl had to take him to one side and have words.     Dion Dublin    looked immaculate all evening and as he walked to the bar to get a mineral water a lady fainted from heat exhaustion. Dion not only caught the unfortunate woman as she fell but also saved her drinks from spilling. An ultimate professional he can do no wrong.   Lee Croft        weaved his way to the bar swerving in and out of supporters. Unfortunately ended up in the corner by the toilets and had to get Hucks to help him out. Spent most of the evening surrounded by female admirers magnetised by his devilish good looks.   Missing   Robert Eagle              His hair did not come out right so stayed in his room   Dickson Etuhu           Turned up for last years party but not this one   Ryan Jarvis                Having a few Pigs Ears with his new China Plates in the Smoke     Ian Henderson            Refused entry by Doormen

I will never say a bad word against the chosen one, but let`s face it Hucks is not a defending midfielder. When he makes the runs and is left upfield Drury is left exposed as on Saturday and needs help from others when the opposition attacks. This has not been happening and we need to have Etuhu working harder, poor old Robinson can not get there quick enough and Andy Hughes just scares the pants off me every time he receives the ball. 

Fear not Peter I`ll take the trip to the Grand Canyon so you can visit St James Park.

Melbourne Canary I wasn`t going to go to the Gala dinnner as I did not think there would be any thing worth going for !!!! Now that I know its` your birthday I`ll be there. Tiger beers are on me. WNW

I am off to Malaysia on the 10th of July and will look out for the items you are after. My normal fee for this is a pint of Woodfordes Wherry come any home match day. WNW